Marcus Rashford (Image: AP/Jon Super, File)

Own goals "I’ve got the hide of a rhino -- you need to in this job," announced British Education Secretary Gavin Williamson in an interview with the Evening Standard, presumably trying to sound like one of the steely higher-ups in Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. Little did he know he was mere sentences away from fashioning a rod to test that hide out. At one point he was asked whether he'd met with Marcus Rashford, the English footballer who has campaigned relentlessly for the reduction of child food poverty, most notably in the area of free school meals, and has been a vocal critic of Williamson. He had, he replied, describing Rashford as "incredibly engaged, compassionate and charming".

Except the person he spoke to was not Marcus Rashford. Williamson's team later contacted the journalist to say he actually met rugby player Maro Itoje, not Rashford, and they spoke about equal access to education during the pandemic, not food poverty. Sure, they play different sports and have different -- if overlapping -- causes, don't have similar names or look at all alike. But they do have one thing in common, which we'll leave to you to work out.

D'Ath D'oh In ongoing "This is how politicians spend their days" news, Queensland Health Minister Yvette D'Ath yesterday gave the federal government both barrels over what she called "false claims" regarding her refusal to allow Afghanistan veterans back into the country. As part of this, she said she had texted Defence Minister Peter Dutton and received no response -- much like Joe Hildebrand before her, slightly misjudging how dramatic it is to show your phone to the gathered press. Dutton replied that he had received no such text.