(Image: Private Media/Tom Red)

God bless the Germans. They’ve given the world the so much: the printing press, computers, elevators, SIM cards, sex shops, hole punches, MDMA and, sadly, the accordion.

But, Crikey satirist Tom Red argues, Germany’s greatest contribution to civilisation is its priceless compendium of ingenious insults. Here he unpacks a few choice examples -- places them in a local context. As he's sure you'll agree, Wir leben in den besten Zeiten, in den schlimmsten Zeiten -- we live in the best of times and the worst of times.

Dünnbrettbohrer

Literal translation: Driller of thin planks.