covid-19 vaccine US america
(Image: AP/Mark Lennihan)

Hurrah, the vaccine is here! Let the rejoicing be unconfined! Truly a holiday season miracle which shows the folly of the war on Christmas and the truth of the Western faith. I mean you don't see Buddha dishing out any miracle cures, do ya?

Continue in this vein indefinitely.

Truly, the apparent discovery of an effective COVID-19 vaccine is a cause for rejoicing, proof of the success of a massive interconnected global effort, subcontracted to both private and public entities but driven by the power of the state to foot the bill.