bridget mckenzie
(Image: AAP/James Ross; YouTube)

(To the tune of “The Adventures of Barry McKenzie”)

The adventures of Bridget McKenzie

Dinky di tales of Coalition

Straight from the purse for marginal pollies

100 million worth of political sleaze

If you wanta get your bagmen in a frenzy

Introduce them to Bridget McKenzie!

She’s got a pollie’s grin and very thick skin

Show her a pig trough, she’ll be in like Flynn

Her staffers’ gall will overrule anyone

She’s got a political thirst, you can do your worst

When they tap McKenzie she’ll be in there first

It’s no use Barnyard, you’ll never win

She’s a better man than you are Gunga Din

Bridget… Bridget… Bridget…

The adventures of Bridget McKenzie

Dinky di tales of Coalition

Rolling pork was to be her mission

All a rich part of Nationals tradition

From the team that brought you Sir Robert Menzies

The Adventures of Bridget McKenzie!

There’s bowling club phonies and Sussan Ley’s ponies

A whole truckload of money to share with cronies

As she rushes in where ethics wouldn’t go

As minister for sport, she knew a good rort

When it came to dirty tricks, she was a good sort

For dodgy sporting grants she’ll carry the can,

And beat the bloody world if Genghis Khan

Bridget… Bridget… Bridget

The adventures of Bridget McKenzie

Dinky Di tales of Coalition

Forget the deserving, bugger the poor

She’s only one step from the acting PM’s door

If Sooty wants to see how his game ends he

Just has to look at Bridget McKenzie!

(With apologies to Peter Best and Smacka Fitzgibbon.)