Marie Kondo, celebrity de-cluttering expert, changed my life. Although, since her TV sensation Tidying Up with Marie Kondo appeared on January 1, such a declaration is unacceptable. Per media opinion, Marie Kondo and her virtuosic storage methods will not change your life.

In the minutes before we dashed all hope of Personal Growth™ for another year, Netflix released this new resolution. From the first day of the year, critics have continued to worry in public that a reality TV show about better housekeeping is not destined to meaningfully reform people. This presupposes that popular media of any sort has the capacity to meaningfully reform people, which it does not. No, Marie Kondo did not entirely change my life. She was, however, present with her handy hints at the time of transformation.