Welcome to the spookiest day of the year. We here at Crikey are big fans of Halloween (sorry angry op-ed writers) but we’re not always the most organised. If you’re in the market for a politics-themed costume, boy have we got some last-minute ideas.

At the very least, take some inspiration from the young girl who made herself look as though she had been senselessly decapitated (she’s obviously going trick or treating as the Liberal Party).

Solo costumes

Kevin Rudd, a bloody knife in one hand, a framed picture of his Good Weekend shoot in the other.

Pauline Hanson’s burka (risky).

A chefs hat, a bandit mask and a sack with a dollar sign on it. Bingo, bongo, bango — you’re George Calombaris, or more or less any celebrity chef.

Daniel Andrews, his pockets stuffed with monopoly money, wearing several blank red T-shirts. (Daniel Andrews alternative: wear casual clothes and tell people you’re celebrating the world’s dumbest public holiday, which you also created). 

If, like this industrious lad, you can get together the material to look like a black hole, you can go as Tony Abbott’s sense of irony.

If you’re celebrating Halloween at a Liberal Party local branch meeting, dress as a turbine from a wind farm. It’ll scare the shit out of them.

Wear a suit, and jam a knife if your back. You could be any number of people. People will get the idea.

Wear a Riddler costume and tell people you’re Steve Ciobo’s job description.

Paint your face so that one side is good and the other evil. You are The Greens rhetoric on sexism contrasted with their actions as an employer.

Mark Latham carrying six volumes of defamation defences.

Paste old Medicare cards over yourself and send threatening text messages to voters. You have no substance but cannot be killed.

Wear a normal suit over a muscle suit. You are Blair Cottrell, ready for your interview about the worrying spread of Salafi ideology across Indonesia on Paul Murray Live.

Couples/group costumes

Mark Latham and Alan Jones as they appear on the cover of their cookbook. Dig out those aprons.

If you have a lot of friends, the ghosts of One Nation senators past. 

Matthew Guy and a big delicious election-losing lobster.

For the obnoxious, newly-in-love couple who wants an excuse to have a big old snog, Tony Abbott and Pauline Hanson.

If you’re a couple who are going through some issues, you could go as Latika Bourke and Julie Bishop, though the shoes on that costume are crazy expensive.

Let us know what your spooky politics-themed costume ideas are by emailing [email protected].

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Peter Fray
Editor-in-chief of Crikey
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