Two Fridays ago, Peter Dutton woke up thinking he’d become prime minister that day. So convinced were Dutton and his camp that they had it in the bag that his numbers men went out for dinner the night before the likely spill; the only hurdle, they thought, was getting enough signatories for the party room meeting petition. Turns out they should have stayed at the office working the phones, like Scott Morrison did. They might have found the three votes to stop Morrison winning 45-40.
Expecting to win, Dutton had flown his family down from Queensland. After the defeat, the Duttons went out for lunch, where they were photographed. Politics is a cruel, cruel business, and while many readers will laugh off the idea, it’s hard not to feel for anyone put through that emotional wringer, even if by their own ambition.
As it turns out, the process appears to have affected Dutton more than it first appeared. Joe Hockey went into a funk for months after narrowly missing the Liberal leadership in 2009 — crueled, he believed, by Malcolm Turnbull’s decision to run, which prevented him from beating Tony Abbott. Dutton isn’t in a funk. He’s in a towering rage, not just about losing, but about the relentless attacks on him, his use of ministerial discretion in the interests of the connected and the influential and, yesterday, by allegations he’d helped some mates with jobs.
[What is ‘parliamentary privilege’ and can I use it to slag off my enemies?]
That culminated in an extraordinary moment when Dutton lashed out in parliament at the man whom he believes is his chief tormentor, former Australian Border Force head Roman Quaedvlieg, claiming the latter “groomed a girl 30 years younger”. Grooming, of course, is a verb very explicitly linked, including in legislation, to paedophilia. Presumably Dutton is referring not to a “girl” but a woman in her ’20s with whom Quaedvlieg was linked in relation to the matter that ended his leadership of ABF. If Dutton has some sort of moral issue with middle-aged men having relationships with much younger women, you’d assume he would start with a slightly more high-profile case involving someone who sits down the other end of the chamber from him on his own side. But that doesn’t explain why he chose to use a smear word like “groom”, except that he knew he could get away with it behind parliamentary privilege.
Liberal-National Party politicians have some form here. George Brandis used the Senate to smear Julia Gillard as a “crook” and never had the guts to repeat it outside parliament, or the decency to produce any evidence. But Dutton has gone much further, in a way that suggests his judgement is now badly impaired. Whether it’s the pressure of being targeted on so many fronts, or his fury of being robbed of a prime ministership he believed was his, Peter Dutton needs some time off to reflect not merely on his hysterical overreaction to Quaedvlieg, but whether recent events suggest his political talents are quite as great as he believes they are. Presumably, if he retains his seat, Dutton will want to be a contender for the leadership after the next election. On current form, his colleagues — or however many of them survive — will be thinking of looking elsewhere.
Where do you think Peter Dutton should go on holiday? Write to [email protected].

48 thoughts on “Dutton needs a break for his own good”
Marcus Hicks
September 12, 2018 at 1:22 pmThe key issues I have are: If Dutton was so bothered by what he now calls “grooming” (the woman wasn’t even remotely under-aged at the time) then why not bring this up during the senate hearings that had been held over the last year?
Second, why is Dutton so obviously less concerned about an almost identical occurrence between Joyce & Campion?
Seems like the irrational rantings of a man who knows he is in deep, diabolical poo.
Les Sage
September 12, 2018 at 1:30 pmNo doubt Dutton will be pre-selected on merit.
MJM
September 12, 2018 at 1:33 pmAnd then lose the seat, also on merit.
AR
September 13, 2018 at 6:13 amHard to grateful for the PHONies but, in the Gestapotato’s case, I’ll make an exception.
The sweet irony of their delightful voters not just tipping him out but giving Labor a chance on preferences – assuming that the LNP sticks to its highly regarded principles and puts the PHONies last on the How to Vote sheets.
They will won’t they?
Or would that be another non core promise?
Tim Howard
September 12, 2018 at 1:37 pmDoes he have any desire to be on the first flight to Mars? That would be the perfect holiday.
Marcus Hicks
September 12, 2018 at 1:45 pmI’d prefer we send him to the sun for his holiday. We’ll send him at night so it’ll be less lethal for him.
Sean Arthur
September 12, 2018 at 1:39 pmWithout even trying it seems that Shorten is doing the Morrison government slowly.
klewso
September 12, 2018 at 2:04 pm“…. it’s hard not to feel for anyone put through that emotional wringer…”???? From which end – brought undone by his own hubris, imagine what sort of PM he’d be and the government he led? What the (majority) country would have to endure?
I do feel for this Plod, nothing.
Hunt, Ian
September 12, 2018 at 3:16 pmI share the lack of feeling for the self- inflicted woe of a plod with awful policies. To cap this with use of “groom” for an adult woman however many years younger reveals a lack of scruple confirmed many times over in the plod’s ministerial role in charge of border Force.
Let’s hope he has groomed himself for a life after politics at the next election
Ng GJB
September 12, 2018 at 2:09 pmDutton has recently shown that he is unable to count, plan effectively or execute a plan. Even when resorting to stand-over tactics to get his way.
Turnbull showed Dutton to be completely out of his depth when under pressure and negotiating a pact, it is probably one of Turnbulls greatest legacies from his time as PM.
How could this failure be considered as leadership material in future?
applet
September 12, 2018 at 2:10 pmI think we need the break from Dutton.
zut alors
September 12, 2018 at 2:22 pmHe’ll have plenty time on his hands after the federal election. Then Dutton & the nation will get the break we deserve.
DF
September 12, 2018 at 2:12 pmAs the the ABC and The Guardian are to him, Peter Dutton is dead to me.
https://www.smh.com.au/politics/federal/they-re-dead-to-me-peter-dutton-lashes-out-at-media-critics-over-white-farmers-20180322-p4z5m6.html
klewso
September 12, 2018 at 2:13 pmThen look at the media back-drop :-
The Dum : Feathers Fanning put the “grooming (of this younger woman)” proposition to Paul Bongiorno, who straightened her out on the actual definition, for her to then put the same proposal to Roy O’Connor, who again pointed her the misuse of the word.
Mike M
September 12, 2018 at 2:14 pmMight be a good opportunity for him to spend some time on Nauru…
Tim
September 12, 2018 at 2:29 pmYe gods, haven’t they suffered enough?!
zut alors
September 12, 2018 at 2:32 pmIt’s a form of additional abuse which hasn’t occurred to Dutton yet.
klewso
September 12, 2018 at 3:11 pmA “break”? As in “Napoleon XIV’s”?
MaggieHG
September 12, 2018 at 7:31 pmI support this suggestion although I take the point that it may not be fair to the current population.