Sparkling white wine in glasses at Mercedes Benz Fashion Week Australia at Carriageworks in Sydney, Thursday, April 10, 2014. (AAP Image/Jennifer Polixenni Brankin) NO ARCHIVING

Please note the introduction of the following amendments to The Social Contract. These matters pertain specifically to Appendix F: Romantic Relationships.

Importantly, the wording here specifies that the term “romantic” when appended to the word “relationships” in this context does not “in any way signify any requirement whatsoever of any romance of any kind”. In fact, the term “romantic relationships” is taken to mean “any relationship wherein the persons involved share an abode and/or finances and/or a Netflix account and/or a memory of having once kissed”.