"My name is Roman, and I am running for the seat of Menzies on this ticket." At the podium in the Church of Christ Doncaster, the thin young man in a sort of black frock coat paused and gripped the pine lectern. Behind, the standard exposed red brick and a chunky wooden cross, looming three metres high and leaning in.

"My experience is in complex computer systems, aged care, and living in Switzerland. I am a believer in a system of management known as …" (say Six Sigma, I thought, say Six Sigma) "... Agile. All parties have something to offer, but all have failed us. That is why I say to you: head of Liberal, heart of Labor, eye of Green." He paused. The audience, white-haired, parka-ed, and not in a mood for any malarkey, shifted in their seats. Roman straightened up a little and repeated, "Head of Liberal. Heart of Labor. Eye of Green."