While former treasurer Joe Hockey has already vacated Parliament (and is reportedly lapping up the sun and peaceful neeoooww neeooow of the MotoGP in Valencia, Spain), his colleagues took the chance to farewell him in the Federation Chamber yesterday, where his work in the local electorates of his colleagues was fondly remembered. Anthony Albanese used the chance to needle Hockey about his musical taste, rightly shaming him for his love of Nickelback. Hockey’s colleague Tony Pasin expressed his disappointment that Hockey wouldn’t be able to use his counting skills in his local electorate:

“Joe’s journey is one which is an inspiration to all Australians. But I must say it is a massive disappointment, because I had always planned to have Joe Hockey in my electorate to call bingo at Murray Bridge. I just thought that the nation’s leading bean counter calling bingo in a small country town would be a great thing. Maybe he will do that once he completes his obligations for the nation elsewhere. I suppose it is an open invitation to Joe. If he ever wants to join me in Murray Bridge to call bingo at the local hotel, I am sure they will have him.”

Speaking after five others, Queensland MP Ewen Jones displayed his unique way with words — as always providing an image that can not easily be forgotten:

“In starting this speech and in listening to the previous contributions, I am struck with the same sort of feeling as must have come before Elizabeth Taylor’s eighth husband on their wedding night: you know what to do, but you just do not how to make it interesting! There have been a fair few things said about Joe Hockey.”

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Peter Fray

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