TV presenter Jeremy Clarkson, soon to tour Australia after a “controversial” delay, is really not much chop. This is not to say that the mediocre man whose broadcast persona was lifted from an imaginary chip shop in the last days of empire is powerfully evil. It’s more to suggest that his appeal is almost solely down to his act as a defender of a particular class of men. If Clarkson is at all interesting — and, intellectually, he really isn’t — it is as how a social species can monetise its own endangerment.
As far as automotive entertainment goes, Top Gear was, at one point, not too bad; not as good as Pimp My Ride but certainly better than Monster Truck Garage. But, of course, as everybody said at the peak of the program’s success, “it’s not about the cars!”. Clarkson’s charm was not so much fuelled by his knowledge of high-performance vehicles as it was by his irreverence. Just as his best mate A.A. Gill never really wrote centrally about food, Clarkson never really spoke centrally about cars. Both men were talking about themselves. And, of course, their dwindling cultural relevance as derisive grammar school twats, a decline that first served to amuse them, and us, and then became a source of anxiety and brought forth a salvo of unfunny racial slurs.
To be fair, there was a time that Gill, from whom Clarkson has received exacting tips on media performance, was very, very funny. “There’s only so much you can do for lasagne in the looks department. The only garnish that would improve it would be a power cut”, Gill wrote in the Times before copying the career of Christopher Hitchens, as Clarkson has tried to, and leaving behind the difficult work of making British newspaper readers laugh at the weakness of the bourgeoisie for the better-paid pastime of taking the piss out of the underclass for American glossies. With few exceptions, Englishmen of letters tend to lose their wit, and their socialist wisdom, in the Atlantic.
Clarkson never made the continental move entirely, but he certainly became, as Hitchens did, a prize fuckwit. As success encroached, so did his need to hang onto it. He built his persona on a self-awareness of life as a useless middle-class duffer. He has tried to sustain it by defending himself and his “rights” as a middle-class duffer. He’s now achieved the opposite of the thing that made him famous. Once, he asked us to laugh at the white, middle-class Englishman in all his endangered primacy. Now he demands that we respect him.
There’s more than a whiff of the white male victim about Clarkson, who has said vile things, which I elect not to amplify here. Whether these things are said to make a point, presumably about “censorship” and “political correctness”, or because he genuinely believes them is of no matter. The only thing that does matter is that Clarkson, for a brief period a refreshing presence, now offers us no more surprises than that other, nicer middling middle-class entertainer, Michael Palin. What he offers is a fear that power is disappearing from his grip, and that of his kind.
In his travel programs, Palin offers disgust masked as fascination. He holds these “other” countries up to the camera with a pair of friendly tongs, never any mention that these delightful and curious places are drowning in malnutrition and debt. Britain gave the world ironic detachment as surely as it did bad food and partitioning — a process that led, in large part, to the poverty Palin ignores. But, Palin, just a little older than Clarkson, can afford to continue the relaxed fantasy that he is an important man. Clarkson feels his importance slipping and abandons his ironic detachment in favour of just being an out-and-out prick.
When the powerful feel themselves failing, they do tend toward brutal, stupid acts. In recent years, Clarkson has revealed himself to be not only as frightened as a minor official of the British Raj in 1947 but also as a wit of only limited erudition. Like a Kyle Sandilands who has half-read the collected works of Auberon Waugh — and Richard Hammond in this scenario is the obsequious Jackie O — he shows us that the Empire has no clothes. Naked and empty of any inspiration save for his need to be loved, Clarkson is now doing less for the England of the historic imagination than the Beckhams.
Clarkson has nothing left to say beyond “Believe me, I’m very important”. His appearance and demeanour led us to believe for some years that there was something more than self-regard propping up the act. But there is even less left in him than there is in England and the 20th-century middle-class Englishman who falsely became a global symbol of erudition and restraint. He has become an angry, underdone bully wailing for his lost privilege. If he’s not careful, he’ll be crushed by a hybrid car.


41 thoughts on “Jeremy Clarkson and the obsolescence of middle-class white men”
thelorikeet
April 6, 2015 at 10:27 pm“Just as his best mate A.A. Gill never really wrote centrally about food, Clarkson never really spoke centrally about cars. Both men were talking about themselves”
And Helen that is why they’re successful
Oh. I always read you as writing through the exact same prism and enjoy it for the same reasons
Helen Razer
April 7, 2015 at 11:58 am@thelorikeet This wasn’t a criticism. Just an observation.
John Lindsay
April 7, 2015 at 12:22 pmPut Jeremy Clarkson in a dress and you have Auntie Jack, a whiskey drinking, cigar smoking, bully, who punches people. And all this while leading a gang in a collection of unusual motor vehicles. Of course Auntie Jack also threatened people who didn’t watch the show that she would rip their bloody arms off so Clarkson has a little way to go yet.
Liamj
April 7, 2015 at 7:58 pmIts a given that Clarkson trades heavily on nostalgia for Empire and white male dominance, but I don’t think he can be properly disemboweled without referencing our car fetish.
Reading car industry pamphlets off an autocue doesn’t qualify JC as having wit or erudition but it does endear him to that large chunk of the population that get jollies from petrol power ego supports. Not every car lover loves JC, but i’ll bet there aren’t any JC lovers who don’t love cars. His enthusiasm for hyperconsumption is the core of his appeal, the ‘crusty’/odious old white man identity is just pedigree & shielding.
Lee Tinson
April 7, 2015 at 9:34 pmHi Everyone. I’ve just tried to send a link to this feed to Clarkson. I hope he gets it. He would be very amused.
By the way, did you know that at his age he is a noted player of games of the X-Box (and other) sort. He regularly beats people a third his age.
That, I think, is how seriously he takes himself.
Ken Lambert
April 8, 2015 at 12:02 amHey Helen, if Pimp my Ride is better than Top Gear, then you have opened the perfect window to your soul.
Pimp my Ride illustrates what Bettina Arndt was quoting recently when she noted that 70+% of US black births are out of wedlock and the dudes responsible were all pimping their rides.
Tired? How can a formula be tired when there are years of queues to get into the audience for Top Gear, and the celebrities are dying to get on and race each other in the reasonably priced car. What could be wrong with a car show where a famous corner is named after the singing detective??
Helen Razer
April 8, 2015 at 2:04 pm@Ken Lambert. Let’s overlook that you (a) chose to use Arndt as a primary source for sociology and (b) have some peculiar ethical problem with unmarried persons, particularly those who are “black” and just look at your statement that a thing must be good because it is popular.
Other things that are popular include One Direction, Malcolm Turnbull and the publications of Rupert Murdoch.
Ken Lambert
April 8, 2015 at 10:58 pmNo Helen, Pimp my Ride might be popular too….so my argument is not just about good being popular. Underneath the schooboy pranks and calculated silliness, there is an honesty about Clarkson and his fellow musketeers in their measures of cars and people.
Exaggerated bagging of crap cars is also met with high praise of some very good cars, and if you are up to date Clarkson has praised a hybrid recently because it was so good. He is almost a convert. You know how converts can become more catholic than the Pope.
German cars which have every gadget that they could turn right and attack Poland, or bagging French cars made by the bolshy grandsons of cheese eating surrender monkeys is as much a part of the hyperbolic fun as bashing Porsches, rusting old Italian supercars and the Morris Marina – Britain’s answer to the Trabi, made by genuine British Leyland bolshies before Maggie Thatcher beat them into shape with her handbag.
Tom Cruise, Michael Gambon, reams of brit and yank celebs all want to race a crappy little car round Top Gear’s track – and funnily enough – they all want to do well. I’m sure Bettina Arndt could analyse large that simple fact.
Robert Topping
April 10, 2015 at 8:12 pmIf only you had half the intellect and wit of the late Mr Hitchens.
Ideology will be the death of journalism. At least Chritopher had a sense of humour.
The fact that your opinions roughly align with mine does not let me forgive your ignorance surrounding the reasons for Clarckson’s popularity.
observa
April 19, 2015 at 9:44 pmIf Clarkson is such a poor entertainer, then how has he managed to build Top Gear into the massively popular show that it is?