All hail the future king of Australia, the eight-pound bouncing baby boy born overnight to the sound of gunfire and the flash of hundreds of cameras aimed a funny man in a silly hat, with a publicly funded silver spoon planted in his little mouth and a hereditary birthright to one day rule over Britain and what’s left of the Commonwealth — including all of us.
And while we’re of course thrilled for the proud parents, while we can revel in the pomp of it all, we can’t help but look ahead to when William and Kate’s little tyke is sitting on the throne. Kevin Rudd might have assured Labor prime ministers can’t be sacked by their colleagues, but King George (that’s the favourite name with the bookies) will be able to cut off their heads whenever he likes. No reform to that, of course.
By the time King James (second favourite) takes the crown Australia will probably be a republic, finally free of the antiquated constitutional shackles of all this royal nonsense. Probably — though that’s something we might have said 20 years ago …
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