Interested in morning tea with former PM John Howard, Opposition Leader Tony Abbott, conservative shock jock Alan Jones and Oz columnist Janet Albrechtsen? Then you’re in luck! The IPA is holding a gala dinner in Melbourne tonight with Rupert Murdoch as keynote speaker, and the morning tea is up for auction.

Australia’s Right-leaning luminaries from politics, business and the media will converge on the National Gallery of Victoria for tonight’s big do, being held to mark the 70th birthday of the IPA.

Crikey would love to put in a bid, but sadly there’s no room for us at the ball — tickets are sold out and the IPA rejected our request to attend and cover Murdoch’s speech. So Cinderella Crikey will be sweeping the steps outside.

Other enticing prizes at the auction include “a behind the scenes experience with Andrew Bolt at the filming of The Bolt Report in Melbourne”, followed by a coffee with the man himself (he’s the MC at tonight’s dinner — will he and Murdoch get to chat about Murdoch’s anti-racism, pro-immigration stance?). You can also tour the Reagan Ranch in California and go behind the scenes at Fox News in New York. Details about the auction and tonight’s gala dinner are in this email (click on it for a larger version):

Interesting to see Tony Abbott will be hobnobbing with Murdoch at the dinner. Our spies tell us Gina Rinehart will put in an appearance, and we hear other speakers will include businessman Hugh Morgan, the IPA’s John Roskam and Liberal luminary Michael Kroger. If you didn’t receive your invitation, check one out here.

This exhibition is currently showing at the NGV — perfect for Rupert Murdoch, surely?