Mar 30, 2012

The new Australian Carrie … UK fuel farce …

In today's Media Briefs: UK papers pour petrol on Torie's burning popularity ... Front Page of the Day ... NDS demands Australian Financial Review retraction ... Leveson inquiry told hacking investigations could cost up to £40m and more ...

Want to be the new Australian Carrie? Fairfax’s long-serving relationship columnist Samantha “Australia’s Carrie Bradshaw” Brett — who once claimed a push-up bra was worth more than a PhD to women — has published her final column. Mumbrella reports Brett is off to give TV news a try. But it was a comment on the Mumbrella article that most caught our eye: a job application for Brett’s job …

My name is Shannon Ford (though I am willing to change it to “Shassy” or “Shancois”). I’m a hip, fun-loving writer in my late-20s who embodies all smart Sydney girls looking for love (and s-x) in The City. All of my friends say I’m “sassy” and that I always give them the best advice on their relationships. This is true. My philosophy is that from our souls to our stillettos, girls are fabulous and deserve to be with a man who treats them like the princess they are.

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4 thoughts on “The new Australian Carrie … UK fuel farce …

  1. klewso

    Anyone else wonder at the coverage the Tories are getting in Blighty?
    Murdoch’s Limited News : for revenge at Leveson being allowed to continue – and not be closed down (like a mate would).
    The UnLimited News : because of the backing and “symbiotic osmotic affects” exchange between Murdoch and his pal D.C. [(which probably stands for something else now?)] – when they were “Your place or mine” friends?

  2. floorer

    Fleet St. has been kicking off on this stuff forever.

  3. Tom McLoughlin

    Dear Shassy,

    Thanks for confirming that sub-species of PR female in Sydney with values and ideals as deep as the layer of paint on a concrete summer patio.

    If you get the job you will fit right in with Sydney’s religious dedication to the price of real estate, ubiquitous new car tv advertising, and barely concealed alcoholism.

    Good luck with the cosmetic work in future years.

  4. Shassy

    Dear Tom,

    You’re totally welcome. We PR ladies are a special and unique breed…a ‘sub-species’ as you say. It’s very rare for a profession to consist entirely of women who are both sexy AND smart. Some might say it’s the product of being born to a wealthy, intelligent, private-equity fund CEO and his beautiful, blonde wife. Others might say that it’s the rejuvenating effects of the Balmoral sea-breeze and the organic canteen food at Queenwood. Either way, Sydney men are lucky to look at us, and Sydney women are lucky to look up to us.

    I’m not sure how deep your layer of paint is on your concrete patio. I didn’t know patios came in substances that weren’t Tasmanian oak or ceramic tile. No doubt you have to paint your concrete patio every few months, just to keep it from looking like a concrete patio. In that case I assume that your layer of paint is deep, just like my values, ideals and emoticons.

    I assure you that I am as excited about writing my new column as you obviously are about reading it. You too can be an ‘IT boy’ by being one of the first to read it at

    🙂 xo Shassy

    P.S. I don’t need luck for ‘cosmetic work in future years’. When I tell my readers to ‘get em done’, they’ll do it.

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