As the interminably long Queensland election campaign grinds to a close, spare a thought for Premier Anna Bligh. Reduced to messaging along the lines of “yes we know you’re going to vote us out, but please be gentle” — take a look at her itinerary from yesterday, presented by Jared Owens in The Australian, and in order:

  • walked the shopping strip of Bulimba;
  • presented students with awards in Greenslopes;
  • played carpet bowls with seniors in Chatsworth;
  • announced an alcohol crackdown in Mount Coot-tha;
  • toured the Northern Busway in Stafford;
  • joined Bob Hawke in Ashgrove;
  • visited a leagues club in Everton;
  • was swamped by schoolchildren in Ferny Grove;
  • drank tea at a neighbourhood centre in Pine Rivers;
  • scored back-to-back spares in Morayfield;
  • lobbied RSL club patrons in Kallangur;
  • strolled a shopping centre in Murrumba;
  • exercised at the Dolphins Club in Redcliffe;
  • sang The Eagles’ Take It Easy with journalists in Lytton;
  • witnessed paper cup production in Woodridge;
  • canvassed night-shift workers in Logan;
  • inspected a warehouse in Algester;
  • cuddled a sick RSPCA puppy in Inala; and
  • greeted newborns at Ipswich General Hospital.

And not a sausage in sight to at least ease the pain. Out on the hustings, in a desperate bid for each and every vote, there is no dignity.

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Editor’s note: Those eagle-eyed among you who read the ads in our esteemed tome may have noticed a job ad for none other than the editor of Crikey. That’s because I’m off on maternity leave as of mid-May. Consider this a community service announcement for those who are keen to apply — given that Mick the sub has already got the jump on you. Political operative Ian Hanke (@IanHanke) has already started the campaign to parachute our sub editor Michael Vaughan into the slot with the hashtag #makemicktheman.

Mick the sub maintains that he neither endorses nor wants any part in Hanke’s naked bid for power. But photoshop extraordinaire Leigh Josey has taken the liberty of imagining Crikey under the reign of everyone’s favourite singleted subbie:

Don’t make us imagine what a First Dog on the Moon edition of Crikey would look like …

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Peter Fray
Peter Fray
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