United States

Feb 29, 2012

Think Kevin & Julia are bad? Imagine if Romney was front runner

Romney, my God. The anti-candidate. As a GOP candidate, all he had to do was turn up to the NASCAR event and shovel down dogs. Instead, he said: "I have some great friends that are NASCAR team owners."

Wyoming has abandoned plans to buy an aircraft carrier. The landlocked wilderness state has hit the headlines after state assembly members proposed a bill to prepare the state for the collapse of the USA, and thus to create its own armed forces, a navy, including currency, etc, etc. After much national ridicule, the aircraft carrier provision was removed. Support for the bill subsequently collapsed. The state’s sole body of water is Lake Yellowstone, frozen over for six months of the year.

Hours to go until the Arizona and Michigan primaries, your correspondent waiting in NYC to see where the candidates break, in what the booking website called an “aparthotel”, but which is really upmarket public-private housing behind the Port Authority Bus Terminal. The lobby is full of Haitian gay couples with elegantly sculpted goatees and recently released female prisoners. The area must be the last genuinely dodgy place in Manhattan, now a Disney version of its former self. The TV service is premium cable with three hundred channels.

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15 thoughts on “Think Kevin & Julia are bad? Imagine if Romney was front runner

  1. paddy

    That’s some grand craic you’ve got going around over there Guy.
    One of your finest off the wall pieces in ages.
    Perfectly pitched to the madness that is the Republican implosion.

  2. Patrick Bowman

    Pure gold today, Guy.

  3. Phil L

    Bang on form Guy, wonderful piece of writing with deliciously weird and trashy undertones….more please

  4. Down and Out of Sài Gòn

    “I like those fancy raincoats you bought. Really sprung for the big bucks.” – HA!

    I think it’s a little dangerous for an Australian to bash the US for its surplus of time zones? Don’t we have 5 when Daylight Savings Time is on? You could double that easily when you take the external territories into account.

  5. Suzanne Blake

    I have been to Wyoming, nice place. Did not see too many nutters there, they must have pollies there be enrolled in Oakeshoot long distance learning.

  6. Mark from Melbourne

    Love to know which tinnitus medication it is????

  7. Brian Williams

    That brought back memories. I arrived in the old Port Authority terminal building on my first visit to NY in early 1980, and was accosted 3 times by drug dealers wanting me to sample their wares before I got out on to the street. The new building is much nicer but it doesn’t sound like the local clientele has changed.

  8. Andybob

    Great to hear Obama’s getting into form. Can you imagine him meeting Prime Minister Abott or Foreign Minister Pyne ?

  9. JamesG

    Isn’t this piece just written like it’s meant to come out in a work of collected travel writing pieces by Guy Rundle (Maybe “Rundle’s Ramblings”? Geddit) for Xmas and it will be remaindered by New Year.

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