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Feb 21, 2012



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35 thoughts on “Private School Hit List? Australia says yes!

  1. DF

    Dunno about the politics of it but I do know about the nausea. When I see that my taxes contributed 70% of Geelong Grammar’s profit (profit? is there a dividend payout?), I feel sick, and it’s not with envy, it’s with injustice.

  2. Crispy

    Mmm. Baked Rump of Year 3 Trinity Prep Student. A modest proposal, Mr FirstDog. Australia says yes please.

  3. Mike Jones

    Clearly the Hereditary Privilege Transmitronic 3000 is ready for an optional boater-powered barbecue function.

    Not just “poit”, but fzzzizzzz, squarp, pishazzz.

    Well done. with dead horse and mustard, please Firsty. Hold them onions.

  4. zut alors

    Did Gonski recommend the introduction of fags for senior pupils at private schools? Not smokeable fags, the obeisant variety.

  5. Sandshoe

    Love the Heath Robinson style machine for the transmission…frame #3.

  6. Andybob

    Don’t know much about history ….

  7. archibald

    I’m getting a whole new perspective on Junior Masterchef.

  8. drmick

    Where did our money go? The current crop of chinless special tie wearing hoorays on the right side of the dressage ring did not do any maths science or geography because they cant do a budget and distrust science and the certainty and accuracy it provides. No winners there. They obviously didn’t attend charm school; and it is equally obvious that any moral or ethical education regarding the truth or facts was blocked from their hearing by the extra finger.

  9. paddy

    That last tasty panel is a gem FD.
    “Would you like foie gras with that?”

    Mmmmm…..Yes please!

  10. Holden Back

    An episode of Iron Chef to which I look forward, “The Private Schoolboy Challenge”.

  11. Mike Jones

    Holden, was that “The Schoolboy Privates Challenge” ? Don’t be fooled they can’t p1ss up the wall any higher than anyone else. It’s an illusion caused by the ludicrously long socks and boaters. I did a straw pole, sorry poll. Look it up under “I shat in the hat”.

  12. Holden Back

    MJ, Your challenge sounds like the panel will go home hungry. Larks tongues, or the like.

  13. Anil Lambert

    Outstanding. Thanks again, Dog.

  14. Murray Hall

    What is it with teh left and wanting to eat children? [/bolta]

  15. Stevo the Working Twistie

    Serendipity, or synchronicity? I was just trying to decide on a recipe for tonight’s Instant Restaurant menu, and was thinking of a Frittata, but as we all know Public School Frittatas rarely turn out well (too many bad eggs). Once again, FD saves the day!

  16. Holden Back

    Stevo, how about:
    School Captain Carpaccio?
    Boarder Bolognese?
    Prefect Parmigiana?
    Old Boy Osso Bucco?

  17. zut alors


    Day Bugs Olio dell’Aglio

  18. Holden Back

    In other baseless speculation is Darren Cheeseman really made out of cheese, and if so, what kind?

    Or is he a poorly-disguised superhero with caseous powers?

  19. Stevo the Working Twistie

    All worthy suggestions, though School Captains tend to be a bit tough for Carpaccio. Slow-cooked Old Boy definitely has possibilities – served with a silver spoon, of course.

  20. SBH

    sorry mike, I wasn’t listening. Did you say long socks?

  21. Mike Jones

    Nice one, SBH ! What knees, must, I suppose.

    Stevo and Holden – Dux a l’orange ?

    DRMICK, the extra finger was a killer – at least you didn’t give the Hapsburgs any lip but the haemophiliacs are definitely in for black pudding……. cue the Monty Python fans …

  22. Plonkoclock

    I’m a Poit. My da went to Geelong Grammer, ay. I rek0n that transmitronic was way overdue for a service when my turn came round..

  23. Mike Jones

    Plonk, if it helps, the working class has never heard of Crikey !

    I am the son of a staunch metal trade unionist. Thank Dog for Gough Whitlam making Uni free for a time – my ticket out of slavery.

    Question: is Beluga caviar as good as it’s cut out to be ?

  24. Plonkoclock

    Dunno. We only had the good stuff. Cats liked it but..

  25. AR

    I could never understand what the problem was with SOYLENT GREEN and have always been in favour of adapting Swift’s “A Modest Proposal” via a means test.

  26. Matthew of Canberra

    Only if they’re stunned first. I’m not eating children if it’s not humane.

  27. Matthew of Canberra

    “I could never understand what the problem was with SOYLENT GREEN”

    Just keep the bone marrow and nerve tissue out of the pot. Bad news, that.

  28. Matthew of Canberra

    “I’m with the group …”

    – Paul McCartney.

  29. Holden Back

    Plonk, Mike – bit of both ends, me. Grandparents boilermaker and small dairy farmer only ’cause their toff parents drank away the family fortunes. Scholarship boy me, to snotty school in the days before they were anything like today’s forcing houses for university entrance. If anyone tells you the rich are smarter than the rest, I have strong anecdotal evidence to the contrary.

    I’d have to be cooked for a very long time to be palatable these days but I am well-marinated.

  30. drmick

    All this cooking business; I hear that at some private schools, they tenderise you sucking on different bits of you before they eat you. I must have been considered extremely tough because many attempts were made to tenderise my head for being a tyke at a public school; although I did enjoy other areas being “tenderised”.

  31. Plonkoclock

    My paternal G’parents were poms of the worst calibre, fairly well off and unbelievably snobbish. When they came to visit, she sat in the back seat and waved good-bye like the queen FFS! Dad went for last two years, with the Manifolds, Baillieus, various princelings, etc. A very lonely time for him, I think..

  32. Holden Back

    Plonk, so sorry to hear that- you’ve obviously dealt with it well.

  33. Plonkoclock

    just wish I’d got a sniff of G’Grandfathers money..

  34. Andrew L

    To paraphrase somebody (I forget who): “I love little (rich) children, especially on toast”

  35. Sandshoe

    No, PLONKOCLOCK, no, no, no. You wouldn’t be PLONKOCLOCK. (Todays cartoon has thrown me a bit tell ya.)

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