I have recently been contacted by a number of concerned citizens (some of whom, like you Dear Reader, are fortunate to be enthusiastic and regular consumers of my ouevre) alerting me to the fact that those of you with more gentle dispositions may be given the vapours by viewing an image, included in error, in the current hilarious and adorable, First Dog on the Moon 2011 Calendar, cleverly entitled 2011 A Space Bandicoot. Here is a portion of the offending “cartoon”. The original appalling pictogram can be seen here.

CanineSodomisesAmphibian - Hilarious!
Disgraceful and dissapointing

It appears that the intended image for this month, “Miss March” – a most artistic pastel and charcoal rendering of Senator Eric Abetz, nude and resplendent upon a bed of thornless Roses with a hardback copy of Cory Bernardi’s “Multiculturalism up the Date – Forced Gay Muslim Marriage in 21st Century Australia” carefully concealing viewers from any upset, was replaced by a dissapointingly grubby cartoon entitled “The Bomb Sniffing Dog and the Bum Breathing Turtle make a lifestyle choice”. First Dog on the Moon apologises for this error which was made in the production process and was the fault of a subeditor who has been fed whole and still alive to Eric Beecher. You can see, even from the redacted version of the image above that it is most unpleasant and accordingly we are frightfully sorry.

Oh my goodness!
We are frightfully sorry

In order to make amends and enable First Dog on the Moon enthusiasts to continue to proudly display their calendar/s  in public places, or to little children, we are kindly providing a series of charming alternative images. Simply download, crop, size, print, cutout, mount on artists card and carefully adhere one of the following adorable images on your calendar over the top of the picture of the dog and the cute little turtle having bum sex.

It's good to have friends
Dramatic tension in your calendar for March
Photobomb! hahahah oh wait...

Update: This last appalling image is available now on a t-shirt because capitalism.

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Peter Fray
Peter Fray
Editor-in-chief of Crikey
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