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Sep 14, 2010


By now you'll have been horrified to learn that Oprah Winfrey -- along with 300 underprivileged, upper-middle-class, diamond-earring-bedecked, screaming American women -- are set to rape and pillage our fair nation.


By now you’ll have been horrified to learn that Oprah Winfrey — along with 300 underprivileged, upper-middle-class, diamond-earring-bedecked, screaming American women — are set to rape and pillage our fair nation to shoot two special episodes entitled ‘Oprah’s Ultimate Australian Adventure’.

As part of the deal between Harpo (Oprah’s production empire), Tourism Australia, Qantas, RM Williams and — we’re hoping — the Big Banana, those iconic white sails soaring over Sydney Harbour will be whored out for the week to be badged as ‘the Oprah House’.

We knew that the NSW Labor government was desperate, but this may be going a bit far.

We’ve all heard of the Oprah Effect. It worked for Spanx, it worked for the Kindle, it made Jonathan Franzen a household name, even if he was an ungrateful git about it.

But are we the first continent to be endorsed by Oprah? Do we get a sticker? And, most importantly, can Oprah save the NSW government?


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7 thoughts on “Australi-Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

  1. zut alors

    Hearing this extraordinary news (on ABC’s Midday, no less) it made me reflect on how to get the maximum out of travel. For example, on my first trip to Paris, why didn’t I convince 300 friends/associates/strangers to board the same flight in order to share the novel cultural experience?

    We could’ve roamed the Champs-Elysees and the quaint backstreets of Le Marais as One. What could be better than being surrounded by one’s compatriots when in unfamiliar territory? En masse we would’ve been insulated from interactions with any Parisians and, if it hadn’t been for that weird currency based on the franc, it would’ve been like Home away from Home.

  2. Hochfelden

    Let’s hope they don’t try to come by boat. The sight of the Australian Navy torpedoing a boat load of Afro-Americans would fill Rupert (The Dirty Digger) Murdoch’s awful newspapers… and Julie Bishop and Tony the Monk would be there beating them back with their surfboards.

    But with Qantas’s record they will probably be delayed with engine failure !

  3. Pete from Sydney

    Course they should, it’s a billion $’s in publicity….Oprah loves us Aussies…and why wouldn’t she?

  4. Elizabeth

    I don’t watch Oprah’s show. The recent news that Oprah’s ratings are way below that she has to create a new sensation by going to Australia. I hope they don’t carry their U.S. litter to the Ozs. Wherever the U.S. lands, they create a problem politically, economically, and socially.

  5. David

    Great idea, great publicity worldwide for NSW and Australia. Oprah’s show goes out to 140 countries 5 days a week, mmmNSW Premier a good ole Southern gal, the electioneering is on, bring on the games…QANTAS will do ok out of it too. Captain Travolta in charge.

  6. Gratton Wilson

    …and she’s cheaper than the pope who cost taxpayers over $100,000,000.

  7. CID

    This is a bargain at $3m. Think how much we paid just to air the “where the bloody heel are you” campaign, and that was a complete dud. It’s only legacy is Lara Bingle. Not a fan of Oprah, but there’s no denying her influence. What she endorses almost invariably flies. When you stack it up against (as @Gratton Wilson points out) World Youth Day, V8 Supercars, Rugby League Grand Final, it’s the canniest investment governments could have made in tourism. And I’m sure it’s not over and above, there are existing, healthy budgets for Tourism promotion.

    “…can Oprah save the NSW government?” Not even she can remove the stench of this corrupt & inept bunch.


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