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Jun 15, 2010



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31 thoughts on “Things my dog says…

  1. zut alors

    ‘There is no situation that cannot be improved by going for a walk’…

    Tell that to BP.

  2. paddy

    Clearly, the *real* FDOTM is a total wimp.
    Running scared from a mere vacuum cleaner?
    Just wait till the Onthemoon family start blowing away the dust with a vuvuzela. 🙂

  3. Mike Jones

    Did you read HG’s spray over the 4-0 loss to Germany over at Unleashed ? Hilarious to the max.

    On that basis, FD should be on the honours list any day now. I can see it now – arise, Sir First.

    On that basis, you might like the Queen’s Birthday greeting over at the pigsarms. Dogs in that too. Corgis.

    Great to see you giving the politcal crap a miss for a day or so, FD. Excellent take on the life of a dog of a dog.

    PS – so what happened about the bird getting rid of the annoying pop-up ? Cut you no ice with her Wrennishness, FD ?

  4. Ern Malleys cat

    Ain’t it the truth, as Andy Cox from The Fauves said:

    Dogs are the best people
    Still tame, still wild, still somehow civilised
    With his bone and his bowl
    And his little chocolate eyes
    Dogs are the best people

    And I’m a cat.
    But we’re way above people.

  5. michael matusik

    what about when you throw olive at it?
    hmmm, “you can be a real dickhead sometimes” and yes he would be right
    ps our mutts dislike the chainsaw even more than the vaccy

  6. Buzz

    Things my dog says:
    “Open the door please, I need a tree”

    Things my dog does not say:
    “It’s OK, I picked it up myself”


  7. Sandshoe

    ERN: “For, tho’ he cannot fly, he is an excellent clamberer.”

    Ern, you will of course be familiar … not intimately … with Christopher Smart’s Cat Jeoffry from ‘Jubilate Agno’.

    I had hoped to find opportunity to graciously mention.

  8. Ern Malleys cat

    Sandshoe: Ta for the Smart tip. Will pore over it.
    I’ve been invited over for breakfast drinks tomorrow with James Joyce’s cat.
    Bloomin’ heck, could be a long day

  9. zut alors


    Don’t you mean you’ll paw over it?

    Strewth, who else’s cat do you have in your address book…

  10. Sandshoe

    This seems timely to say, by the way, congratulations on becoming your own Cat, EMC. 🙂

  11. SBH

    Buzz one of my dogs says ‘the door was shut so I wizzed inside’

    Is it a whippet FD, breed speculation please other posters.

  12. Venise Alstergren

    The pooch is a bit back at the jaw. Ne c’est pas? Perhaps it’s a large Jack Russell?

    One day Muhammed found a cat sleeping on the sleeve of his coat. Rather than disturb the cat, he had a servant cut out the sleeve, then he told another servant to take his coat to the tailor to get a new sleeve!!

    ¡That’s CATappreciation!

  13. Buzz

    @ Venise: maybe Muhammed just didn’t want to risk ‘quality time with Mr Subacute Regional Lymphadenitis’.

  14. Ern Malleys cat

    SBH: I bet First Dog does wish he had a whippet so he could sing Devo’s Whip it!

    I say whippet, whippet good!

  15. deccles

    I think it’s a jack russell. It’s certainly a jack russell on his twitter photo.

  16. paddy

    @Deccles, that’s not a Jack Russell. That’s Kristina Keneally with a very bad haircut.

  17. paddy

    In fact the haircut was so bad, the poor beast has been in hiding ever since.
    Pictorial evidence….Here.

  18. Venise Alstergren

    BUZZ: Perhaps. I can understand the first two words, and am working on third one.

    It doesn’t hurt to fly the feline flag occasionally. 😉 :meow:

  19. Venise Alstergren

    EMC: Here kitty kitty 😎 meow. Puss puss.

  20. Buzz

    @ Venise: see Jasper – 2 ‘toons ago, “David Marr on: Cranky Kevin, the true truth”. The technical term for cat scratch fever.

    I am blubbing into lots of tissues tonight. I’m just home from the vets where I had to put my beloved Burmese cross kitty of 15 years down. Her kidneys and liver finally gave out and she was at the end of the road physically. It was very peaceful but now I’ve come home to her empty bed, collar and bunny blankie. waaaaaa! 🙁

    Things she used to say:
    “Oi, you, feed me and feed me now.”
    “You just can’t get good staff these days.”
    “That dog is a boofhead, what do you see in him.”

    Vale Dinky.

  21. Venise Alstergren

    BUZZ: I’m so sorry. It’s rotten at the end; but I’ll bet she had a wonderful life with you. And she had a good death, a merciful one.

    Call me heartless but the only antidote for this is to go to the RSPCA and get another one. I’ve had two other ones from them. Walnut I rescued from drowning.
    First there was Beau who chose me by sitting on my feet, then there was Topaz. He was a little cross-eyed and the smartest cat I have ever known.

    I got him at the age of ten-the cat, not me, and he ruled Walnut for five years, and me totally. Walnut is seventeen and soon it will be my turn to go through the trauma.

    She’s fine, pretty fit and pretty healthy.

    Enough about her.

    I command you to go out and risk your heart all over again. Tis the only solution.

    Good luck

    Vale Dinky 😥

  22. Kahomabu

    @ Buzz – Vale Dinky.

    Mr Lovely Dog – frame one is the truth of the world. You must be a dog after all!

  23. Sandshoe

    Oh, you will be sad for a good while Buzz. 🙁 xxooxx

  24. Mike Jones

    Buzz, condolences. Fifteen years is a long partnership.

    First Mate has a 14 year old rag doll cat (I refer to as the “Wee Scabby Cat” because it has terrible skin and is constantly worrying itself – making things worse). This moggy has a prednisone habit that makes Keith Richard’s habits look amateurish.

    So I’m dreading a re-run of your recent experience. Fortunately the younger Burmilla is good for a lot more years.

    And so’s the Shar Pei doggy – with whom I share a great mateship. Beautiful nature. Great sense of humour. Aesthetically questionable.

    Kahomabu – so true – frame 1 got me through yesterday’s black dog and hopefully many more.

  25. Mike Jones

    First Dog, Can I have a T-shirt of Frame 1 ? How do we organise that ?

    [It is easy – you say something like “First Dog, Can I have a T-shirt of Frame 1 ? How do we organise that ?” and then I say, “You should email me that request otherwise I will lose it” and then when you email it I turn it into a t-shirt and you buy it because you promised. FD]

  26. Ern Malleys cat

    Buzz: I shall have an extra long sleep today in honour of Dinky. waaaaa indeed.

  27. Innocent Until

    Yes! That’s it! I’ve been missing my walks. How did you know? Time to harden up and get out into the Winter sunshine.

    Shouldn’t Mike Jones have to say please?

  28. Mike Jones

    Innocent, Yes he should the bastard. And if he’s gotten to HIS age without knowing the correct use of “can I” and “may I”, I’ll eat his hat.

    I have it on good authority that he was overcome by the sheer grace and beauty of the ‘toon and temporarily forgot his manners.

    Thank you for pointing this out Ms Until.

    Please may I have a T-shirt, Mr OntheMoon ?


  29. Venise Alstergren

    MIKE JONES: @FD: Hahahahahahahahahaha..:cool:

  30. Chris Johnson

    I’m glad you listen to your wise and intuitive four-legged best friend. You’re a better dog for it!

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