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FIRST DOG ON THE MOON

Jun 1, 2010

Only 48 hours to go...

... until National Andrew Bolt is a Dickhead Day

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55 comments

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55 thoughts on “Only 48 hours to go…

  1. Jeff Waugh

    I’m sure Barack Obama will be celebrating again this year!

  2. Aron

    ROFL. Is it a coincidence that it will also be Mabo Day?

  3. zut alors

    Priceless, Mr Onthemoon!

    For any serious music aficionados does the Glenn Milne Kazoo Orchestra have a CD can order?

  4. John Donovan

    Still no thoughts on the Dogs weekend “performance”?

  5. Kahomabu

    Dear First Dog

    You are lovely and you are FUNNY!

    ‘Homeland Poffertje Smackdown’ I will smile on that all day, and probably into tomorrow and beyond. In fact I will revisit it often to get that ridiculous sense of ridiculousness.

  6. deccles

    The Glen Milne Kazoo Orchestra. Sublime. Boltian fetish? Ewwwww

  7. Callum

    Crikey is well and truly dead – killed by left wing fanatics who bastardised the bi-partisan approach that symbolised it for so long.

    On one page, you have Keane abusing anyone who does not share his opinion, be it on environmental issues or IR. Another page is dedicated to attacking journalists who support the right.

    This abuse does not encourage debate, it effectively censures it. The fact that they were attempting to be covert for a few years is irrelevant.

    So what will Crikey do when membership really starts to drop? When revenue starts to really dry up? Hopefully disappear.

    Debate on crikey is dead – killed by these so called journalists.

  8. Phil

    Dear First Dog

    Isn’t Andrew Bolt a dickhead every day?
    Let’s just call 3rd of June Rightard Day and give out the Bolt award in honor of the dickhead.

  9. Jenny

    I will take chocolate biscuits to Thursday’s staff meeting in celebration of NABIADD.

    Glad to see the interpretive dance bandicoot is getting involved – I await more claims of ABC bias. But why do all the dancing doggies look like they are taking a piss? Or are they taking THE piss? Subtle. Nice.

  10. Holden Back

    @ Callum
    Which party AB supports is irrelevant, it is his dickheadedness which makes him special. It’s sweet that you count his support of the Right as something positive – you’re so inclusive.

    If anyone qualifies for the epithet ‘useful idiot’ it is he. Sadly, he has the effect of making the Right look mean, pompous and stupid to anyone else.

  11. Ern Malleys cat

    February 30 — Andrew Bolt Isn’t A Dickhead Day.

  12. Liz A

    You are quite right to remind us of this important national celebration FDOTM… and Andrew’s achievements have been worthy of celebration this last 12 months too!

    Shall we list the ways that Andrew has excelled as a dickhead over the last 12 months? I’ll start.

    My personal favourite was the defending of Piers (Arsehat) Ackerman’s misattribution of former IPCC chairman and British Met Office CEO Sir John Houghton by attempting to find another sentence in Houghton’s book that contained the word “disaster” and spuriously linking the two.

    This was followed fairly closely by his defamation of Tim Lambert following that gentleman’s debate in February with the potty peer Lord Monckton, in which Andrew stated he was “vituperative, deceptive, a cherrypicker, an ideologue, a misrepresenter and a Manichean conspiracist only too keen to smear a sceptic as a crook who lies for Exxon’s dollars”.

    Any others that spring to mind?

  13. zut alors

    @EMC

    Ah ha, you’ve been sharpening those claws, kitty.

  14. paddy

    June 3rd? Obviously dogs can’t read calendars.
    Or else they’re just too involved sniffing drains at Labradoodle acres. 🙂

    EMC That would be February 31.

  15. Holden Back

    @ Paddy, but isn’t that National Infernal Cooling Day?

  16. Venise Alstergren

    CALLUM: We love you too.

    Even you should know that, with the exception of the Fairfax media, all the MSM is hard right-wing. As is the man who owns it all, Rupert Murdoch. The man who re-wrote the history books with his inflexible ‘Right is right, so write it’ dogma.

    With all of the ‘purchased press’ rushing around to bag Kevin Rudd-baggable though he be- not one of you asks the question. “Why did the Labor Party get into power?”

    The answer being “After eleven years of John Winston Howard and his band of thugs, the electorate was desperate to get rid them.”

  17. Ern Malleys cat

    … go ahead caller…
    ‘Hello Andrew? Hello? Am I on? Hello Andrew. I’m outraged! You’re not going to believe it, but that ruddy nong Professor Onthemoon is at it again. This time he’s claiming to be a journalist, for crying out loud! I haven’t seen it myself, but I hear he’s killed Crikey. Crikey! And he’s being horrible to a real journalist who says what I would think if I could. Did I say I was outraged?!

  18. Sandshoe

    Is any rational individual likely to comment about anybody engaged in people’s choice popularity contests at this juncture, as did Elizabeth Barrett Browning in Sonnet 43 (Sonnets from the Portuguese, 1850) 😐

    How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
    I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
    My soul can reach.

    I, Sandshoe, wish I could say about someone in this contest, as did Elizabeth Barrett Browning in that Sonnet 43 😐

    I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
    With my lost saints.

    I, as well, Sandshoe, say the People seem to be unheard (of). Given I have no wit neither further words of my own at this juncture 😐

    If this be error and upon me proved,
    I never writ, nor no man ever loved. -William Shakespeare (1564 – 1616)

  19. Sandshoe

    Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, that latter is from SONNET 116
    “Let me not to the marriage of true minds … ” 🙂

  20. klewso

    Dolt’s a “journalist” – and Mengele was a “doctor”.

  21. Mike Jones

    Dog, this looks like a super duper party. I wish I could join in.

    I only know Blot et al because of you. I’ve never actually seen, heard or read him – because I have better things to do with my pathetic excuse for a life.

    Like read your excellent ‘toons – and the comments of our august Dogonauts.

    I am wondering how it is that you can manage to single out this particular deadshit with so many arsehats from which to choose.

    ….. and so little time……

  22. David Sanderson

    Sorry I won’t be able to attend. I’m already booked for the Miranda Devine is a Bernardi-loving Boofhead Event.

  23. davidk

    I want to know where the leftist Cup Cake Bacchanal is to be held
    @ Calumny as so often happens with the right, you erroneouslydamn others for what you yourself are so happy to engage in. It’s called Projection. Ask your therapist about it.

  24. Mike Jones

    Doggy, did you see the Warrigal digital mischief over at the pigs arms ? New standard in Joe Hockey pisstaking.

  25. paddy

    Ooh!! Look what I just got from Sophie Black
    Get a purple twibbon for your avatar here dogonaughts. http://twb.ly/cUcbxA

  26. Cuppa

    Grow up Callum. The more left wing media we have in this country the more balanced the media will be. Because the overwhelming majority of the mainstream is right wing, as Venise Alstergren said. Can’t hack some progressive media like Crikey? Then go to the Australian, the Daily Telegraph, ABC or any of the other right wing outlets. We desperately need Crikey and Fairfax to provide SOME balance against the hard right News Ltd and their ABC.

  27. Christine Johnson

    So how come Sydney gets shlumpadinkas like Piers Akerman and the Glenn Milne Kazoo Orchestra? I reckon fashion savant Carson Kressley should host The Andrew Bolt Annual “Cut the Conservative” starting this year with Bolt himself. Minus his college boy comb-over, suede jackets and checked shirts Bolt could look like this: http://bit.ly/dqalKR
    Next year we do Gerard Henderson!

  28. Phil

    Intesting thought Christine, that remains me.
    Q: What would you get if you mated Kressley with Bolt?
    A: Nothing, because there are some things even Kressley wouldn’t do.

  29. twobob

    Shall we list the ways that Andrew has excelled as a dickhead over the last 2 months? My turn.

    His post stating that oils spills are not that bad was great evidence of his dickheadedness which has been completely outdone by his current posts defending Israel’s right to board boats in international waters and then kill people who try to repel these borders. What a prick.

  30. zut alors

    @Twobob

    But surely he was talking about the oil spills on his concrete driveway or garage floor, not real oil spills…

  31. Sandshoe

    i tort it was butter stains from the piece of bun on palmer’s shirt i am o, unworldly

  32. Sandshoe

    That needed a nice fullstop period wing-ding thing, one of these little f*ckers. Maybe couple of these, so childish as well as unworldly I know (can’t be told). 😛 :razz.

    No worries. 😎

  33. Sandshoe

    Damnation.

    :razz. does not maketh a face with a licky red lollopy up and down thing poking out.*

    That is in fact made by a colon followed by the word razz with another colon behind it like on a little a*se on a little barking dog. Hold on. Here give razz followed by a colon and with a colon in front of another go.

    😛 razz:

    Hope that’s good better and bets on best. This is important reading.*

    No worries. Sorry. 😎

    * Full credit to obviously well qualified Venise (a bargain I have come to think) who taught me a lot of what I know as a dogonaut alternative spelling dogonaught and doganuts did win some admiration when I misspelt dogonauts. My own fame is not obscure.

  34. Sandshoe

    I like all of youse here. Although I don’t much like Callwhatisname saying Crikey will go down a gurgler thing so to speak like a whole earth into a black hole. Rude.

    😛 😛

  35. Leigh Josey

    Comrade, Fremantle Football Club will be wearing purple this weekend in solidarity.

  36. Sandshoe

    Three cheers! Everybody! Did you see too that bloke came out on the news last night! In support of not going along willy-willy like with Remote Shack WA and called it inhumane! Beat the drums!

  37. Jahm Mitt

    The Charlton Nazis are having a “Paddle Andrew Bolts Bottom Day”.

    The sternest of caning, strapping, paddling and spanking will commence at the exact same time that Andrew Bolt wakes up and continues until he writes his first bit of dribble.

  38. Venise Alstergren

    Anybody who thinks Andrew Blurt is an intelligent human being should just read the Hun of the ‘2 June ’10’. This should disabuse you.

  39. Jahm Mitt

    As a side thought…..

    The Herald Scum – rarely ever allows comments on it’s “Google copy paste” articles any more.

    The lack of a dynamic infighting or commentary is usually a sign that:

    a) The paper is run by arseholes; and

    b) Stupid arseholes at that – because:

    (i) If people are not commenting, then they are usually disinclined to read the cheap shit “Herald Scum” copy paste article; and

    (ii) If people are not reading the articles; then their worthless and shitty advertising and the revenue from the sales; are not worth anything either.

    So while the likes of Andrew Bolt and the corporate pricks who publish that shit carry on, the best readers and harvesters of community consciousness, are usually pointing out great stuff to read – as it happens, on sites like http://slashdot.org/ and possibly even here…

    And the comments are full of livid infighting and commentary – and unlike Bolt’s bullshit – you can actually learn quite a lot.

    And I also note that Bolt and the Herald Scum never gets a mention on the really good sites….. why? Because Bolt and his bum chums are slowly whirling away in the back waters of history.

  40. Sandshoe

    @JAHM: Hello Jahm. I don’t think I’ve seen you before. I’m the deceptively made up one with the brilliant green head. Your avatar/gravatar (t’mart-o/t’mate-o) appears to be an eagle with an air cooler fan dangling in its talons? Wassat mean? Are you trying out for that entertainment where scienists and pseudos shoot dummies from cannons and measure how far they would hurtle if they were real people?

    You don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to. Just asking.

  41. Sandshoe

    That word is ‘scientists’ in case anybody wandered into thinking I meant ‘scienists’, sorry again.

  42. Firstdog

    We’re having cake tomorrow!

  43. Venise Alstergren

    JAHM MITT: Today I met a man who claimed to be an acquaintance of Andrew Bolt. He told me that Bolt really and truly believes his own garbage.

    I don’t know if makes me feel any more, or any less tolerant of this obscene clown.

  44. Jahm Mitt

    @Sandshoe – I am single. I need rooting. Your attention excites me.

  45. Sandshoe

    @JAHM MITT: I have a stuffed parrot and a peg leg made of cement, but as well a small income that is independent of concern money will come between us. I do not in fact have a garden, but only a shovel (a spade by any other name) and a small bottle of rooting powder left over from my passed husband suffices generally. You look after yourself. Dream on me (I know. It’s the green hair). Kisses.

  46. Dalziel

    Hey FD.
    Whats the details for bike ride in Sydney?

  47. Dalziel

    Oh, OK. Look on the interweb-thingy, right …

  48. Sandshoe

    @DALZIEL: have you been drinking too many FD cartoons? What bike ride in Sydney? I will have to get a wriggle on. I am still languid aprés a marathon in Paris.

    FD? I can understand running randomly after wheels going round and flashing toe clips, but you keep a diary! Of events riding a bicycle? If you would be so kind to explain.

  49. JamesK

    @Venise. I’m not disabused. That’s presumably because I’m evil.

    @FDOTM. Oh dear!

    Once embarking on an anti-intellectual ad hominem slime and gratuitous appeal to the lowest possible common denominator in order to whip up low rent support for your diminutive credo, it’s pretty well essential etiquette that you be at least somewhat funny in order to avoid being viewed as a complete berk.

  50. Venise Alstergren

    JAMESK: WTF have you got to do with my remark-reiterating what an acquaintance told me, to another person, JAHM MITT?

    It was an idle comment.

    If you insist in infesting this area, you might at least learn the rules. And the rules here are don’t take yourself too seriously, and play it light.

    Which was exactly as I was doing.

    Or do you have a plan to destroy First Dog with your own self-opinionated crap? You have become such a determined bore in other areas of Crikey that everyone else ignores you. Yet you now wish to contaminate this blissful oasis. [Play nice – FD]

  51. Venise Alstergren

    PS: I scarcely believe you know the meaning of the word etiquette. I don’t have to be funny; I’m just part of the audience.

  52. Venise Alstergren

    JAMESK: I apologise. I thought your whole comment was directed at me.

  53. Firstdog

    Careful Venise, if anyone is going to destroy First Dog with their own self-opionated crap it’s going to be me.

  54. shepherdmarilyn

    Hilarious.

  55. Venise Alstergren

    FIRSTDOG: Ouch! It was a mistake. 😯 and 😳 And I did say sorry.

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