RazziesThroughout the hullabaloo of the annual film awards season one ceremony maintains a proud history of spotlighting the worst Hollywood has to offer. No, I’m not talking about the Academy Awards, though we all feel the pain when Mr. Oscar dishes out golden statuettes to people like James Cameron and Halle Berry. I’m talking about the Golden Raspberry aka Razzie Awards, which this year celebrate “29 years of dishonouring Hollywood’s worst.”

The 2010 nominations were announced this morning and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (aka Trannies, Too) came an even first with Land of the Lost, each film chalking up seven nominations including Worst Picture, Worst Screenplay and Worst Director. Trannies, Too deserves this ignominious distinction but Land of the Lost was nowhere near as bad as the press would lead you to believe.

Intriguingly, Sandra Bullock might pull off the bizarre achievement of winning a Razzie and an Oscar in the same year. She’s been nominated as one half of the Worst Screen Couple award along with All About Steve co-star Bradley Cooper. Bullock is expected to be nominated for a Best Actress Oscar for her part in American football drama The Blind Side. If she wins (the Oscar, not the Razzie) expect to read some convincing arguments that this is in fact an early sign of the apocalypse (I might write one myself).

For a full break down of the nominations, scroll down to the bottom of this post or visit the Razzies’ website, which deserves its own Golden Raspberry equiverlant for terrible web design.

In addition to the usual categories the 2010 Razzies will feature a set of Worst of the Decade awards for Worst Picture, Actor and Actress.

The nominees for Worst Picture of the Decade are:

Battlefield Earth
Freddy Got Fingered
Gigli
I Know Who Killed Me
Swept Away

They’re all veritable stinkers, that’s for sure, but Freddy Got Fingered is so bad you can barely call it a feature film – it’s more like a pastiche of gross-outs in line with an episode of Jackass. My money is on Battlefield Earth; it lugs with it the kind of epic pseudo prestige that just begs to be shot down and a gong would inevitably stick the boot into Scientology a little bit too (careful voters, you might get Fair Gamed!).

The nominees for Worst Actor of the Decade are:

Ben Affleck
Eddie Murphy
Mike Myers
Rob Schneider
John Travolta

Throughout the uh-ohs Affleck and Murphy have starred in an incredible array of duds – stinker after stinker after stinker – and both of their “achievements” have been well recognised by the Razzies: Affleck has been nominated nine times and won twice; Murphy has been nominated 12 times and win three times. If I had to choose between them I’d pick Murphy. There is a great performer still lingering somewhere behind all those iffy decisions and creative cash-ins, and that makes a Razzie much more deserving, at least in my books. Nobody would take Rob Schneider seriously – not even as a recipient of worst actor of the decade. And it’s a damn shame Matthew McConaughey got off without a nom.

The nominees for Worst Actress of the Decade are:

Mariah Carey
Paris Hilton
Lindsay Lohan
Jennifer Lopez
Madonna

The Mariah Carey nomination is bogus – the only reason Carey got it is because she tallied an impressive 70% of all votes for Worst Actress in 2001 (for Glitter). But just one terrible performance shouldn’t qualify anybody for worst actress of the decade, especially with such healthy competition. A gong for Carey would look silly anyway with respect to her role in the powerful Bronx-set drama Precious, which is certain to pick up some Oscar nominations and in which she proved she can (gasp!) actually act. It’s always amusing sticking the boot into Paris Hilton, but that seems so blasé these days, and as such a perfect caricature of herself she seems pretty much impervious to criticism anyway. I’d lock in J-Lo. Anybody who disagrees ought to sit down and watch in a single sitting a back-to-back marathon of Angel Eyes, Enough, Gigli, Jersey Girl, Maid in Manhattan, Monster-in-Law and The Wedding Planner and see if that doesn’t change your opinion. The experience would be enough to turn a devout Christian into a staunch, deeply haunted atheist – you know, the kind who sits in a rocking chair staring into the wall with drool dribbling from their mouth while endlessly uttering “there is no God.”

I assume the Razzies are not offering a Worst Director of the Decade category simply because it would look a little silly when they assigned all five nominations to Michael Bay.

Here is the complete list of this year’s nominees.

WORST PICTURE OF 2009
“All About Steve”
“G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra”
“Land of the Lost”
“Old Dogs””
“Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” (a.k.a. “Trannies, Too”)

WORST ACTOR OF 2009
All Three Jonas Brothers, “Jonas Brothers: The 3-D Concert Experience”
Will Ferrell, “Land of the Lost”
Steve Martin, “Pink Panther 2”
Eddie Murphy, “Imagine That”
John Travolta, “Old Dogs”

WORST ACTRESS Of 2009
Beyonce, “Obsessed”
Sandra Bullock, “All About Steve”
Myley Cyrus, “Hannah Montana: The Movie”
Megan Fox, “Jennifer’s Body” and “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen”
Sarah Jessica Parker, “Did You Hear About the Morgans?”

WORST SCREEN COUPLE OF 2009
Any Two (or More) Jonas Brothers, “The Jonas Brothers 3-D Concert Experience”
Sandra Bullock and Bradley Cooper, “All About Steve”
Will Ferrell and any co-star, Creature or “Comic Riff,” “Land of the Lost”
Shia Lebouf & Either Megan Fox or Any Transformer, “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen”
Kristin Stewart and either Robert Pattinson or Taylor Whatz-His-Fang, “Twilight Saga: New Moon”

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS OF 2009
Candice Bergen, “Bride Wars”
Ali Larter, “Obsessed”
Sienna Miller, “G.I. Joe”
Kelly Preston,“Old Dogs”
Julie White (as Mom), “Trannies, Too”

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR OF 2009
Billy Ray Cyrus, “Hannah Montana: The Movie”
Hugh Hefner (as himself), “Miss March”
Robert Pattinson, “Twilight Saga: New Moon”
Jorma Taccone (as Cha-Ka), “Land of the Lost”
Marlon Wayans, “G.I. Joe”

WORST REMAKE, RIP-OFF OR SEQUEL (COMBINED CATEGORY FOR 2009)
“G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra”
“Land of the Lost”
“Pink Panther 2” (A Rip-Off of a Sequel to a Remake)
“Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen”
“Twilight Saga: New Moon”

WORST DIRECTOR OF 2009
Michael Bay, “Trannies, Too”
Walt Becker, “Old Dogs”
Brad Silberling, “Land of the Lost”
Stephen Sommers, “G.I. Joe”
Phil Traill, “All About Steve”

WORST SCREENPLAY OF 2009
“All About Steve,” screenplay by Kim Barker
“G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra,” screenplay by Stuart Beattie and David Elliot & Paul Lovett, based on Hasbro’s G.I. Joe Characters.
“Land of the Lost,” written by Chris Henchy & Dennis McNicholas, based on Sid & Marty Krofft’s TV series
“Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen,” written By Ehren Kruger & Roberto Orci & Alex Kurtzman, based on Hasbro’s Transformers Action Figures
“Twilight Saga: New Moon,” screenplay by Melissa Rosenberg, based on the novel by Stephenie Meyer

WORST PICTURE OF THE DECADE (3 SPECIAL 30TH RAZZIE-VERSARY AWARDZ)
“Battlefield Earth” (2000) — Nominated for 10 Razzies, “winner” of 8 (including Worst Drama of Our First 25 Years)
“Freddy Got Fingered” (2001) — Nominated for nine Razzies, “winner” of five
“Gigli” (2003) — Nominated for 10 Razzies, winner of seven (including Worst Comedy of Our First 25 Years)
“I Know Who Killed Me” (2007) — Nominated for nine Razzies, “winner” of eight
“Swept Away” (2002) — Nominated for nine Razzies, “winner” of five

WORST ACTOR OF THE DECADE
Ben Affleck — (Nominated for nine “achievements,“winner” of two Razzies) “Daredevil,” “Gigli,” “Jersey Girl,” “Paycheck,” “Pearl Harbor,” “Surviving Christmas”
Eddie Murphy — (Nominated for 12 “achievements,” “winner” of three Razzies) “Adventures of Pluto Nash,” “I Spy,” “Imagine That,” “Meet Dave,” “Norbit,” “Showtime”
Mike Myers — (Nominated for four “achievements,” “winner” of two Razzies), “Cat in the Hat,” “The Love Guru”
Rob Schneider — (Nominated for six “achievements,” “winner” of one Razzie) “The Animal,” “Benchwarmers,” “Deuce Bigalo: European Gigolo,” “Grandma’s Boy,” “The Hot Chick,” “I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry,” “Little Man,” “Little Nicky”
John Travolta — (Nominated for six “achievements,” “winner” of the Razzies) “Battlefield Earth,” “Domestic Disturbance,” “Lucky Numbers,” “Old Dogs,” “Swordfish”

WORST ACTRESS OF THE DECADE
Mariah Carey – (The Single
Biggest Individual Vote Getter of the Decade: 70+% Of ALL Votes For Worst Actress Of 2001), “Glitter”
Paris Hilton (Nominated for five “Achievements,” “Winner” of four Razzies) “The Hottie & The Nottie,” “House of Whacks,” “Repo: The Genetic Opera”
Lindsay Lohan — (Nominated for five “achievements,” “winner” of three Razzies) “Herbie Fully Loaded,” “I Know Who Killed Me,” “Just My Luck”
Jennifer Lopez — (Nominated for nine “achievements,” “winner” of two Razzies) “Angel Eyes,” “Enough,” “Gigli,” “Jersey Girl,” “Maid in Manhattan,” “Monster-in-Law,” “The Wedding Planner”
Madonna — (Nominated for six “achievements,” “winner” of four Razzies) “Die Another Day,” “The Next Best Thing,” “Swept Away”