During this morning’s editorial meeting we accidentally found out that had First Dog on The Moon been born a girl, his name would not, of course, be Handsome Mr Dog, it would be:


We also discovered he was a Catholic surprise baby.

This all turned into a fun game of:

What Would You Be Called If You Were Born a Boy/Girl?

Editor Green doesn’t know. He did tell us he was “born dead” though. We told him to call his mum.

Incidentally, this is what Green would’ve looked like had he turned out to be a girl baby:


Crook also doesn’t know. He does, however, know that he was born “on drugs” and spent the first few days of his life fascinated by the tennis ball moving back and forth across the Wimbledon court on the TV in front of him.

Brown kicked so much in the womb that her family were convinced she was a boy and they were going to call her Robert. Which proves the nature v nurture theory (she’s a kickboxer people). Bob for short. Or we may have made that bit up.

Jamieson also doesn’t know. She says her mum tells her the first ten years of her life “are a blur”. Amber’s dad wanted her to be called Wistari. That’s the name of a reef off Heron Island, the island on which Amber was conceived. Hopefully not actually on the reef. Too much information? Perhaps. Amber’s sister Tenaya was named after a lake in Yosemite National Park. Amber was jibbed.

Black — Marcus, or Benjamin. And the next name on the list after Sophie? Disturbingly — Morag.

Leigh is pretty sure he would’ve been called Leigh.

Mick the subbie? Elizabeth. Which suits him, oddly enough.

Do you know what you would’ve been called had your chromosomes rearranged themselves into the opposite sex?