Won’t somebody think of the Cougar drinkers?

Brendan Nelson will. And he’s not taking the p-ss. Instead of standing up for stay-at-home mums or solar panels, the Opposition Leader has sided with ‘ute men’ and underage drinkers.

Dr Nelson is blocking the 70% tax hike on pre-mixed alcoholic drinks because the plan will hurt the true battlers: real men who aren’t afraid to sip on a mixed drink, and girls whose tipple comes with a free g-string with every six pack.

The government deserves to be questioned on their $3.1 billion revenue raiser, but the Opposition’s message is more mixed than the Bundy and Coke they’re defending. Joe Hockey has been inadvertently informing the underage public of the best way to get slaughtered tax free by holding aloft a bottle of pink champagne in parliament and his presser, stating: “It is the same price as the alcopop. It has twice the alcohol, half the tax.”

Got that kids? And failing that, there’s always the goon bag.

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Peter Fray
Peter Fray
Editor-in-chief of Crikey
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