In Crikey’s Poll Night Party Planner pack, we humbly present:

And without further ado, some decorating advice:

Liberal Party

For the Liberals, a picket fence-themed party is always a hit. The Pimms, G&Ts, sherry and champagne should flow, um, liberally. A mock lawn can be installed inside the home for delightful games of croquet and lawn bowls. If there’s more room, badminton always sets a whimsical tone. Parlour games are a must: think charades (though the only answer, “Kevin Rudd”, can grow tiring after a spell), blind man’s bluff and Pin the Fishnet on the Downer. Listen to the election call on the wireless for an authentic experience.

Labor Party

Kevin ’07 revellers need a decorative mood that’s triumphal and happy — but can be turned around at a moment’s notice. This requires a delicate host to navigate guests’ jubilation/despair. We suggest reversible posters and table cloths that quickly flip from rainbows and butterflies on one side to reveal storm clouds on the other. In a pinch, sparklers can be turned into fire starters to transform your optimistic decor into an apocalyptic vision. To keep guests entertained, the Howard pinata is a very popular choice this year but you’re running out of time to make one. eBay has a few but they’re not cheap. Inflatable punching bags are a good alternative option, and less effort. Simply paste the face of your target onto the bag and blow. If you can buy one second-hand that’s desirable; whatever the outcome, it won’t survive the night.

Greens Party

No Greens party would be complete without a solar-heated spa; vegetarians to supply the bubbles. For the walls, make a collage of all your favourite Bob Brown moments from recycled newspapers! To cut down on water usage, we suggest strong spirits only. In fact, why not hand out green jelly vodka shots at the door to get people in the mood! And of course, don’t risk the wrath of your mates — make sure it’s carbon neutral!

Democrats “Party”

A Democrats party is a quick and easy option. A good choice if you’re looking for an early night. Black crepe paper liberally strewn will suffice for decoration. Chocolate mudcakes fashioned into coffins provide a sweet touch. Invite guests to make-their-own black arm bands at the door.

Peter Fray

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Peter Fray
Editor-in-chief of Crikey