Interviewer: Oh doctor, you’re in trouble.
Haneef: Well, goodness gracious me.
Interviewer: For every time the AFP
Puts questions to you, see,
A flush comes to your face,
And your pulse begins to race,
It goes boom diddy-boom, diddy-boom, diddy-boom, diddy-boom, diddy-boom, diddy-boom-boom-boom-boom, Boom diddy-boom, diddy-boom, diddy-boom … Well, goodness gracious me.
Haneef: From New Delhi to Darjeeling,
I have done my share of healing,
And I’ve never shot a gun or built a bomb.
I remember that with one jab
Of my needle in the Punjab,
How I took out Al Zahari
And the dreaded Al Zarquawi,
But your complaint suggests that this is where I’m from.
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(Remaining pages deleted by AFP supervising officer. To hear an audio file of this interview, click here.)