Rove McManus ranks somewhere in the vicinity of Kochie and Kerri-Anne in the list of “Australian television personalities least likely to grasp the inherent complexities of American rap culture”. As such, he and Xzibit — platinum-selling rapper and star of MTV’s Pimp My Ride — were always going to struggle for conversation.

Thankfully for Rove it never came to that, with Xzibit (real name Alvin) providing Rove Live with an ol’fashioned showbiz no-show last Sunday. He wanted to perform just over a minute’s worth of a track from his Full Circle album, released in Australia in March. It’s a basic request for an artist in the country promoting a recently released album. But Rove’s producers decided it wasn’t gonna happen.

(Buble did his bit to fill in for Xzibit by channeling his inner “gangster crooner”: the “whitest thing ever to happen” on Rove, says guest Seth Rogen. Watch here)

Here’s Xzibit’s version of events, with thanks to the social-networking/democracy-enabling virtues of MySpace:


Tonight the sh-t was wack going to the tv station. The gopher of the show came to me with some idea of a “rap off” with a lounge singer named micheal booblay. but they wanted me to use “FAMILY VALUES” as the track to rhyme over. BULLSH-T from the jump! I tried to meet them halfway by letting them know my songs are not to be butchered and I didnt feel like that was a good representation for the music I love and create. “lets do something else” long story short we get it all worked out and then the gopher comes back and says ” we only have 42 seconds for the entire thing, our demographics on our show wont allow 1minute of rapping…” then she says some sh-t.

“you know we came a long way just having you on the program..” I got up and thanked her for the time and wonderful hospitality and went out the front door hopped in my sh-t and rolled out. keep it G people. F-CK THAT DUMB SH-T. I got real work to do. peace.