Andrew Loog Oldham, who managed The Rolling Stones until 1967, once famously said, “The Rolling
Stones
are more than just a group – they are a way of life.”

Is Macquarie Bank managing director Allan Moss having similar delusions
when he talks about people enjoying the “totally Macquarie
experience” when they fly to Sydney? The comments came as Macquarie
lavished $358 million on Smarte Carte, the world’s biggest airport trolley and locker
business, which has a monopoly over Australia’s airports.

With Macquarie tipped to be one of the leading bidders for the AWAS
aircraft leasing business, the day might yet arrive when you’ll fly on
a Macquarie plane, land at Macquarie’s Sydney airport, use its airport trolley to reach your car and travel down its
Eastern Distributor tollroad to visit one of their seven office towers
in Sydney and North Sydney, which include the Citigroup Centre,
Macquarie’s head office at 1 Martin Place and the Allianz Centre. Check
out the full list of office towers on
page 16 of the Macquarie Office annual report.

I occasionally fly to Sydney and drop into the ABC head office at
Ultimo which relies on transmission towers owned by Macquarie
Communications Infrastructure Group
to reach its vast audiences across the country.

If you feel like relaxing in Sydney, you can always pick up your
boat
from one of Macquarie Leisure’s 1300 berths in NSW, or why not
go bowling at one of the hundreds of bowling alleys they control in Sin
City?

Similarly, one of your elderly relatives might be in one of the
14 retirement villages that Macquarie scooped up
from The Salvos last year. Until the business was profitably sold in December 2003, you could even fly to Sydney to die and
Macquarie would look after all your funeral and cremation needs as the biggest player in that market too.

Even if you plan to blow up the Sydney Harbour bridge, you could “ask
Macquarie” which last year bought the world’s biggest explosives
company, Norway’s Dyno-Nobel, and shifted its headquarters to Sydney
ahead of a public float.

I’m flying to Sydney on February 9 for the Patrick Corp AGM and might
even try to carry out this dream lifestyle for a few hours in the
afternoon. Drop us a line at
[email protected] with any suggestions for the itinerary. For
instance, a visit to the ATO building in Newcastle would be part of
this exhilarating experience.