The truth is that the Ashes 09 were like two pretty ordinary sides that were fighting like sissy kids in the schoolyard. One of them won. It wasn’t Australia.
Articles by Jarrod Kimber 
About Jarrod Kimber
When he was a knee high to an off spinner, Jarrod’s parents could not afford a junior cricket bat, so his fathers team mates cut a broken bat in half and gave it to him. Through childhood he carried that bat everywhere. Some say if you look at him today he still carries that bat with him, metaphorically speaking, not on the tram (or the tube). On the field he was a leg spinning all rounder, his major skills in cricket revolved around fielding, sledging and captaining, which didn’t help at the selection tables. He once saw one player try to stab another with a stump. He once opened the bowling with two spinners, (Martin Crowe like), him and his mate got spanked. As well as cricket has he dabbled in film making and is currently making some sort of living out of cricket writing. His proudest moment is waking up Adam Gilchrist accidentally on a plane, and a documentary where you can see inside a guys asshole. He hopes, but does not really care, that you like his blogs.
England wins Ashes, 16 months of barmy humour ahead
For the next 16 months we have to endure open-top buses, MBEs for scratchy batsman and all the jokes about how rubbish we are, writes Jarrod Kimber.
Ashes 09: The Oval, the Fifth Test preview
Ashes series are only played every four years in the hearts and minds of the average English fan (the Australian series are in a shocking time zone). So this test is like the Olympic final of Tests.
Ashes 09: Australia remember how to win as England lose the plot
The only logical explanation for why Australia went from a struggling cricketing team to a dominant force in the Fourth Ashes Test at Headingley is that England always had a paper thin batting line up and, for once, Australia had their bowlers in form to take advantage of it.
Ashes 09: Headingley, the Fourth Test preview
This series is looking more and more likely like it could end up as the statistical anomaly series. With the weather and the form of the Australian bowling unit, it is hard to see exactly how Australia will win this test.
Ashes 09: The silly point of watching cricket in the press box
Press boxes at the cricket across England are very odd places, full of old men, cliques and long lunch queues.
Ashes 09: England only win when they’re swingin’
Australia still can’t play swing bowling. England can’t take wickets without it. Jarrod Kimber looks back at the Third Test.
Ashes 09: Hughes’ Twitter drop — Gen Y meets the Baggy Green
Phil Hughes performed a cricketing first today, becoming the first Test cricketer to ever announce on Twitter that he had been dropped — before the Australian team had announced he was.
Ashes 09: Edgbaston, the Third Test preview
At one of the venues for the Domestic Twenty20 quarter finals today they could have set up a toddlers pool at long on, and long off, and part of midwicket. Tomorrow’s whether at Edgbaston is not supposed be any better.
Ashes 09: the swine flu diaries
Crikey’s Ashes correspondent Jarrod Kimber becomes the second high profile (ahem) Australian cricket journalist to get swine flu.
Ashes 09: Lords, the Second Test preview
Australia haven’t lost at Lord’s since 1934 — with a history that strong, it would be rude of England to win.
Muslim = Al Qaeda … Penbo’s Punch in top comic form
There are some Australian cricket fans still furious at England’s time wasting to draw the first Ashes test, none more so than “Steve”, the mysterious friend of The Punch Editor David Penberthy.
Ashes 09: A joyous draw, long live Test cricket
You may want to punch them right now, but you have to respect England. Jarrod Kimber looks back at a fascinating First Test.
Ashes 09: A Crikeyish preview of the First Test
The Ashes start today. I can tell because every pub in London has a poster for Sky Sports in the toilet, writes Jarrod Kimber.
Sayonara Symonds, there will never be another you
James Sutherland will never allow us another you, Roy. You are it, a dying breed of drunkard cricketer.
Ashes 09: Sizing up the squad
Jarrod Kimber gives a run-down on the selections for this year’s Ashes team.
