Rupe’s Jordan dip shrouded in revelation
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There are revelations, there are shocking revelations, and then there is the rare double-take revelation — whence, in revealing something shocking, the revealer assumes you know something that you find yet more shocking still. Thus The Guardian and other newspapers splashed out yesterday with the revelation that Tony Blair was the godfather (yes, yes) to one of Rupert Murdoch’s and Wendi Deng’s children — one of the two who will take over what remains of the News empire, and push it into China, long after they have done away with James, an obvious dud. Yes, the story is surprising, even given the well-known closeness between Murdoch and Blair — and the desire to bind him into the family with some bullsh-t archaic role that has a medieval aspect to it. But what was really eye-popping was mentioned in passing: that Blair had attended the christening of the Deng-Murdoch children “on the banks of the Jordan River”. Say what? They did what? Apparently so. One had either forgotten it, or never known, but there it was hiding in plain sight — a Hello magazine photo shoot with the entire extended family, down by the riverside, having allegedly sought out the place where, by tradition, Jesus was baptised. Surely this is the real story. Blair’s sycophancy is well-known. If Rupe had decided to convert to Judaism, Blair would have been at the Deng-Murdoch bris, playing the role of foreskin*. Murdoch’s identification as a Christian to varying degrees, and in varying contexts, has been going on for years. But the banks of the Jordan is summat else. The Hello shots of the event are instantly self-parodic, of course — the whole gang in white, presumably to look sepulchral. Instead they hover between a publicity shot for Dallas c.1979, and the summer snaps of the Ceausescus, who favoured a similar look. But what is most grimly funny is what a travesty of Christianity they are. After all, the whole point of Christian rituals of baptism, communion, etc, is the idea of full presence everywhere at such key moments — a baptism can be done with tap water, communion with a Salada, and whatever surrounds the rite in question should be mild concessions to the human need for ceremony. Having your baptism on the banks of the Jordan, as if being closer to the spot where one quasi-fictional or historically composite character didn’t baptise another one, is to take Christianity backwards — to make it some crude, idolatrous form, as if Ba’al were hanging around Ramallah. The crude idea that this could somehow be better is some weird mix of new age wackiness, familial narcissism, megalomania and Chinese god-emperor worship all bound up in one package. That Blair, who believes himself told by God to destroy Iraq, came along for the ride is all to be expected. When ruling elites and cliques approach their decadence, ritual and superstition take over from rationality, because a clear-eyed view of the situation does not square with your self-belief. Murdoch’s Christianity may or may not be sincere, but it is emblematic of the manner in which an idolatrous, hollowed-out version of the religion has been adopted by a ruling elite who for a decade or two placed their faith in the mantra of growth, consumerism and free markets. Blind Tiresias can see that this doctrine alone does not merely encourage nihilism — it is nihilism in essence. Before the very recent present, every culture existed on the premise that significant parts of it were incommensurable, untradable, non-quantifiable — the sacred, whether that be a funny-shaped rock, a social order, the Sabbath, whatever. But the sacred is merely a special case of “fixed meaning”, whether it’s a sense of place, of mutual obligations, of habits and institutions that sustain a worthwhile existence. In the past three decades, in the West, these aspects of life have been subject to the most extraordinary ungrounding in history — only the brief period of high Bolshevism and the Chinese cultural revolution can compare, and their effects were partial rather than global. The dissolution of all that grounds people, and the insistent argument that any lingering disquiet you feel at this is your own fault, has sent people rushing back to religion of various types for several decades now. More recently, those enforcing the whole deal have felt the need for the same sort of religious anchoring that the nihilism of capital requires. But there’s a problem — Christianity is originally a doctrine of radical equality and reciprocity, scornful of power. That won’t do at all, so contrary versions of it become popular. For the American Right, its forms of evangelism that celebrate the accumulation of wealth, as an extension of the “good works” doctrine, and celebrate power and inequality as a necessary component of charity. In the Anglosphere, conservative Catholicism has increasingly become the religion of choice. Retaining a hierarchical cosmology that originally mirrored medieval power, suffocating any notion of radical doubt in a cloud of incense and gold leaf, and with a complex system — confession, purgatory, etc — that makes it possible to take the notion of sinning seriously, without actually stopping doing it. Catholicism has become a means by which the Right can subcontract a series of enforcers — from Miranda Devine to Angela Shanahan in Oz, and a few others — to enforce the notion that no big changes — the market, globalisation, the destruction of local community — has a real effect on human being or character. It’s all bound up in a departure from faith, belief, the Western etc, and those institutions that purportedly sustained it, such as the father-led family. Such pundits, the Right’s useful idiots, have always believed this stuff, even as their employers and editors dismissed them as wacko. What has changed recently is that Western power and its structures of manufactured consent — from consumerism to European social democracy — are all starting to fall apart. News Corp in Britain and perhaps in the US, has hollowed itself out, because it was so eager to deploy a nihilistic approach to human tragedy, friendship and the like. So inevitably, the whole family would appear at the banks of the Jordan — less to be washed clean of sin than to imbibe its magic powers. Dressed in white, they look less angelic than upholstered, a group portrait of overpriced sofas. White, the colour of purity in the West, and mourning in China, looks less like shifts for the purpose of baptism, and more like shrouds. A revelation indeed. *Yes, I know they are both daughters. |
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40 Comments
http://www.uswaternews.com/archives/arcglobal/5pollthre11.html
hopefully they went north of the damn
I gather from Wikipedia that while the covenant of circumcision bris milôh is pronounced bris in Yiddish it is written brit milah.
But would Blair really celebrate Murdoch’s conversion to Judaism? I understand he is virulently christian, which of course to monotheists means virulently anti all other isms ‘cept capitalism.
Generally I find Rundle only a little more accurate than the proverbial stopped clock, but…
This is a much under-recognised truth, among several others in this piece.
Just imagine,for a moment or two, what if one of the Murdoch press’s celebrity “targets” had done this, and then kept it secret for a couple of years only for the pics to leak out. The headlines would have been a joy. But because it is Murdoch and despite his troubles he is still feared the focus is on Blair! It would seem that the Murdochs lost touch with reality a long long time ago
“…a baptism can be done with tap water, communion with a Salada, and whatever surrounds the rite in question should be mild concessions to the human need for ceremony.
Pfft, leave that for the Goyim.
Actually SBH, let’s hope they did it south of the dam, truely more fitting - they all are so stenchworthy
Today at Doncaster shopping centre I witnessed a joyous event; I saw young mothers rushing along - pushing their strollers and prams, crying with pure happiness. When I asked what it was all about, I was told: ‘haven’t you heard of the baptism on the banks of the Jordan River? Must go now.’ It was such a joy to see these young mothers heading for the newsagent to buy the latest copies of New Idea, Who, Womans Day, etc. to read all about the happy event that has embraced the Murdoch and Blair families. What a joyous occasion for all. For the first time in many years, I’m going out to buy Rupe’s Australian, which I expect will have the full revelation of the happy event splashed all over the front page. Who knows there may even have a piece written by Glen Milne opining his view of the happy event. Methinks there is a case to believe that this could be second coming of the Messiah.
If they did JoanJett it would explain the state of the water.
Don’t be too hasty Mord, anyone whose seen someone covered in olive oil at an adult Greek orthodox baptism can see the potential for serious fun
Actually, to me it looks more like Rupert (praise be upon his name) allowing Tony Blair to play the role of John the Baptist.
Neither of the kids is called Salome, though, is she?
‘… they hover between a publicity shot for Dallas c.1979, and the summer snaps of the Ceausescus…’
Fair suck of the sav, Guy, the Ewings were classy compared to News Clan. Although, it must be conceded that whereas we once regarded JR Ewing as possibly the most evil and unethical man in Western civilisation, that title has been snatched by another. In fact the photo reminds me of a quasi-benevolent KKK minus hoods.
A superb read.
I assume this was part of a Jordaninan tourism promotion - for the well-heeeled Western Christian market rather than more refugees.
Such religious over-tones, yes, and the symbolism was certainly not lost. BTW…Blair is an Episcopalian christian. But the symbolism? Are they intending someone from their loins to be messianic? And what was the Kidman lass doing there? There has to be some guilt by association in that one.
@ GJ
Blair converted to catholicism in 2007.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2007/dec/22/labour.uk
BTW Poms do not generally refer to the Church of England as “Episcopalian”.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Episcopal_Church_%28United_States%29
It’s interesting that outside of the NT, historically He is also mentioned in the Torah, Talmud and Koran, but you Guy, would know him as Yeshua HaMashiach. And as you probably know, he did n’t come to start up a new religion called christianity.
In fact, the early christians were never called christians at all. They were called followers of the “Way”..Acts 9:2, 22:4 and simply Nazarenes in Acts 24:5, 26:26 but never christians until the term was given to them very derogatively by the Romans some 100 years after the event at Antioch.
Great article Mr Rundle.
Gary Johnson - I think you’ll find Blair converted to Catholicism recently.
Your footnote was epic, in the style of Terry Pratchett’s
Actually, I think you be right. My mistake, but he was once heavily into Episcoplianism.
Perhaps Nicole is their scientologist representative, thereby covering all the bases? (just in case)
JoanJett - I’d bet a small amount Our Nicole is a cradle Catholic and hasn’t so much as looked at an e-meter since divorcing Their Tom.
I would imagine Rupe and his crowd were baptised South of the dam. Very fitting indeed for that lot.
Didn’t I read about this months ago in the UK press when it was announced that Kidman and Jackman were godparents to one of the girls and Blair and Lachlan godfathers to t’other?
I also recall having read in an article about Wendi Deng to publicise her first-produced film, that Nicole Kidman, Bono, Mark Zuckerberg and Tony Blair, amongst others, are her closest friends. Hugh Jackman apparently became another ‘bestie’ after his role and work in said film - Snow Flower and the Secret Fan. Incidentally, Our Nic has been a good Catholic girl all of her life. Rumour has it that that was the great stumbling block in her first marriage.
About the baptism itself - why wouldn’t Rupert wish to show all obeisance to God Him/Herself who has annointed RM, obviously, to be Leader of the World?
It was appropriate, in my opinion, that Tony Blair, who has recently converted to Catholicism, attended and participated in this ceremony. As one of the more significant proponents for Crusades 2.0, swanning around with the King and Queen of Jordan, who are fighting off insistent demands for a legitimate constitutional monarchy and a bit more to eat for the rabble, was especially fitting. Politicians and the Church in the West have a particular history in this region and Blair was merely acknowledging tradition.
“Oy vey - they remembered to bring the dove(s)?”
Blair missing from that happy snap - practicing his “Have more than thou showest,
Speak less than thou knowest …..”, speech for the after-festivities show?
maybe it’s the beer talking, but what hell are you on about? and why is this (your opinion) even news?
@aphra - an interesting point. He can probably nominate/annoint anyone at all and it would n’t matter because he owns the broadsheet megaphones and networks which do the thinking for the people and convince them of anything he wants to. A key-man in the greater ” scheme” of things is he.
@Michael Zusman - Spot on. The sect of the Nazarenes, which was really just another sect of Judaism and also known as followers of the Way, where Light-Years away from what it eventually morphed into..ie..modern day christianity.
When the Emissaries eventually died off and after all the J*ws were kicked out of the assemblies it began to alter course dramatically and into what is known as Dispensationalism.
The early “christians” being eaten by the lions in the coloseum?…They were Nazarenes/The Way but the history books don’t tell you that.
I run hot and cold about Guy’s work. This one hits the spot.
What a bunch of absolutely valueless crims and nobodys that photo includes. Priceless.
Luke 3:22/The Fool (King Lear)?
I’m all for bashing Blair and Murdoch at every given opportunity. However, this “revelation” is as stale as a discarded communion wafer that rolled under the font - but then again, it’s such a great excuse to give all Christians the hiding the bastards undoubtedly deserve. And it’s such a fashionable attitude among the self-professed intelligentsia these days!
“Some bullsh-t archaic role that has a medieval aspect to it” - no smidgeon of personal prejudice in there, is there? Such an obvious level of seething hatred doesn’t engender any kind of faith in any of your other opinions, Mr Rundle.
Never mind N or S of the dam but surely the two Js did that moist thingy on the WEST bank?
Using the East merely reinforces the fact that Jordan is a wholly owned subsidiary of amerikan corporations as well as the “Jordan is Palestine” revisionism promulgated for the last couple of decades by the Eretz Israel crowd, which originated in the New York schetl under Schneerson?
Zut - what’s with the “semi-benevolent KKK”? Mudorc? Benevolent? On which planet?
Moderobot strikes again! Has Crikey subbed the job to the Southbank Sook’s flying monkey brigade?
I suspect Crikey has outsourced its moderation to Pagemasters, the mob that is doing such a good job subbing Fairfax’s broadsheets.
Claire, you might try re-reading what was written. While your parody of the ‘progressive attitude’ to Christianity is all too common, the piece makes several intelligent points about the core message of Christianity, and the position of many within major denominations, in contrast to the Byzantine ritual depicted in Hello magazine’s coverage, and the rhetorical uses to which a professed ‘Christian faith’ is put by various right-wing columnists.
But carry on.
Rupert is a Jew according to the law of the Talmud, and indeed according to the present laws of Israel.
Rupert’s father Sir Keith Murdoch attained his prominent position in Australian society through a fortuitous marriage to the daughter of a wealthy Jewish family, née Elisabeth Joy Greene. Through his wife’s connections, Keith Murdoch was subsequently promoted from reporter to chairman of the British-owned newspaper where he worked. There was enough money to buy himself a knighthood of the British realm, two newspapers in Adelaide, South Australia, and a radio station in a faraway mining town. For some reason, Murdoch has always tried to hide the fact that his pious mother brought him up as a Jew.
@Claire
Not so, Rundles article simply high-lights the hypocricy of institutionalized christianity and the way it’s professed and promoted by those in the “health” and “wealth” zone. That pic says far more than any of us will ever read in the newspapers.
Rundle has not thrown the baby out with the bathwater. His criticism is reserved not for the common “misled” but good hearted folk within the Institution, but for the Institution and those who epitomize the lies and hypocricy of that Institution which down through history has buried the truth and murdered those who spoke the truth.
@Archibald Tues 3.42pm
Yes, he did convert, but he was a long time Episcopalian. Thanks
@ Zelda - and those who epitomize the lies and hypocricy of that Institution which down through history has buried the truth and murdered those who spoke the truth.
It’s deadline time Zelda, but anyway, what is truth?
@AR, 8.37am: ‘quasi-benevolent’ because, in the photo, the M Clan weren’t actually hanging, burning, routing or pillaging.
Zut - that’s proof! of how cunning they are, wearing clean sheets whilst the ‘hanging, burning, … and pillaging’ goes on in elsewhere!
Not sure about the “routing”, unless they are into town planning which I’ve not the slightest doubt could be turned to evil in such hands.
Or ‘more’ evil for anyone trying to build a cubbyhouse or aviary in their backyard.
GaryJ’s a Septic? I’ve never heard CofE called Episcopalian elsewhere.
If Blaahh has any religion, apart from Hubristic Narcissism, surely it would be Manichaeanism?
He may have converted on paper and for the official record, but an Episcopalian he remains.
” You can take the boy out of the Episcopalia but ya can’t take the Episcopalia out of the boy.”
It’s a quote from someone but I can’t think who it was.
Diamond Girl - the Catholic Church would claim they’ve taken his soul for good, and they are an episcopalian church in that they have bishops rather than a presbyterian church, which does not.