Libs left Rudderless, Rudd is all around etc
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So senior Libs are looking to replace Malcolm Turnbull with Andrew Robb, another exclusive in The Australian reads. Clearly Rupert has put up a rocket up his organisation worldwide, in the wake of the latest $2 billion loss. Break stories or I’ll break your hands. Hence, in the cut-throat UK market, the News of the World’s desperate use of mass illegal phone taps to scarf up gossip and scandal. Here, it resulted in raising the risks (slightly, but perceptibly) for serving police officers, in the drive to get a scoop on the Melbourne Somali raids. Now, as two Tele photographers face charges for breaching military security, senior Libs are talking about another spill. Which most likely means that an Oz journo begged on bended knee a friendly Lib or two to muse about the possibility off the record. Well replacing Turnbull now, fast, decisively, is a bright move, and Robb has many qualities that would recommend him as a caretaker leader to take the party to a loss. But he has one big strike against him. He looks like Kevin Rudd. OK, not exactly like Kevin Rudd, but take a look. It’s the same style — silver hair with a part, roundish face, designer specs. Worse, he looks like an old Kevin Rudd — tired, dehydrated, while Rudd bounces around full of p-ss and beans. Imagine them facing each other across the despatch box. Robb would look like a photo of Rudd that had been aged by a computer, to show what a 12-year-old boy missing for 30 years would now look like. He looks like a grainy photocopy, a second-hand copy (“you said mint condition!”), he looks like Rudd will when he’s defeated, a decade or so down the track. They even have virtually the same name. OK, this is all coincidence, but there it is. It would just be weird. This Ruddiness is becoming a major problem. Wayne Swan already has the same sort of look, (“Do you want the name brand, Rudd, or would you prefer the cheaper generic, Swan?”) and the Ruddlets are spreading out. There’s Melbourne University’s Glyn Davis, which must make working in the office really weird — like Rudd had sent a hologram to watch over you — and Tony Jones, which makes Lateline appear to be an episode of double-vision, Rudd interviewing himself, something not due to happen until 2011. So, no, not Robb. Sorry mate, we already have several of you. If Jolly Joe Hockey won’t suck the poisoned chalice, then it’s time for some radical thinking. Give it to someone whose career is over, and willing to take one for the team, like the night of that uni rugby camp, when the girls had gone and the tequila took over. Nick Minchin is the obvious go. Or go the other direction and get Alex Hawke, to make it interesting. Winners cut their losses, let their profits run, losers do the reverse. Guess which move keeping Turnbull is? Better move fast, team dark blue, or you’ll be rudded and dudded, fobbed off and Robbed. |
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19 Comments
“Give it to someone whose career is over, and willing to take one for the team, like the night of that uni rugby camp, when the girls had gone and the tequila took over.”
That is just so unbelievably wrong.
Put Robb in, and it would be “The portrait of Kevin Rudd” - With Rudd as the one who looks better over the years.
Yeah Adam it is wrong, but I loved it.
Who would want to lead the Libs at the moment? Why on Earth would you? My favourite conspiracy is that most of the Libs hate Malcolm; blow in that he is, and would relish the opportunity to see him take one for the team, in front of the whole country. And it’s going to be a big one next election.
Brilliant Guy, laughed my rocks off. Your comparison, Andy Robb and the PM, very funny. Doubt the Libs will find it amusing, but may do them the world of good to have a few laughs, long as Malcolm the Mad doesnt see them. of course todays non movement in the unemployment percentage wont help things, but hey whats in a number? Unless one is in a spill?
Meski beat me to it, Andrew is Krudd’s Dorian Grey portrait.
You mean, someone like Malcolm Turnbull?
No, I guess that rules Malcolm out.
i know! i know! i know! Bring on the Borg!!!!
Andrew Robb? He visited my local area sometime in 2006?7? and he was speaking about Worst Choices. I rang and asked him a question or two and he was hopeless. Out of his depth - almost embarrassing. He always comes across as though he’s just woken up? Or perhaps he’s just dumb? None of them have any integrity. They remained silent during some of the most grubby, shabby and downright stinking legislation brought on by Howard, and didn’t have the guts to stand up to him - they loved keeping their seats and income! A few notable exceptions, starting with Pedro, Judith and a couple of others! The rest? Pathetic and despicable - all of them!
The Borg? Someone like Krige? You jest. Now the Cylon villain, Number Six, there’s a villain you could vote for.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Number_Six_(Battlestar_Galactica)
meski, the borg is the living dead. how can you beat that? although yes, number six is a teeny bit better looking.
Liz45 - the same can be said for Wayne Swan. I was invited to an intimate lunch, from memory there was 12 of us, and his economic and business acumen / logic, response to questions and rationale to his responses and all round non concise speech was very disappointing and I thought, not up to the quality you would expect of our treasurer. Certainly appeared out of his depth and probably the reason why you rarely hear or see him in the media. I don’t expect this to be a suprise to the majority of people however.
I think Turnbull is weathering the hurricane (it is a hurricane!) quite well actually, he hasn’t fallen yet and the Robb takeover was tried by the media but just didn’t have any credibility or legs.
The ALP does have issues to contend with such as convincing the electorate that more stimulus is required when we have registered 0.6% growth on very little stimulus, the ETS and the recent IRCC findings on the likely increased business costs due to the consolidation of awards.
It is well known that there are only a select few people within the ALP who are able to ask Turnbull questions (a la Costello) during question time. Time will tell, and it is hard being in opposition after so long in government, but I think Turnbull will be ok.
If the appropriately named SIMMOBC’s illogical, illiterate and much-belated submission to this debate is any indication of the state of Post-Howard Liberalism, then heaven help Malcolm Turnbull because his party members are utterly incapable of doing so!
I might also point out to all the poor little Tory kiddies out there that the Government does not ask questions of the Opposition during Question Time.
well, given your 3rd and most recent contribution is your longest however still structurally void of any argument, I won’t waste my time in a meaningful response. I am glad that post WW2 ALP governments are short lived.
that’d be devoid, dill.
cheers, 4th.
I’d expect better from a Cephalopod although I must admit, I do like squid rings. Are you an Arts Grad?
judging by the time lapse between successive thoughts, I’d say you could get a job as a Turnbull advisor qualified in looking up “concocted” on Google. Maybe you could even get a job as Turnbull.
hook line and sinker, good for a laugh in London.
go to sleep malcolm, and don’t forget to put the cat out, if it’s still alive!