Crikey

“Grown men were in tears” as little Colin finally died just after 8.30am after being euthanised by lethal injection this morning.

As news.com.au reported, the brave little marine mammal “struggled to the end”, so much so that it took “seven jabs” to do the job:

…Colin the abandoned baby humpback whale struggled as he was dragged behind a boat before being left to thrash on a beach after he was injected with a fatal dose of anaesthetic this morning.

No word on whether the sick cetacean was granted a last meal, although A Current Affair did speculate last night as to whether this miracle Sea World whale baby formula could’ve saved him:

As hapless Colin dominated the headlines, news continued to filter through about the Hunter Valley “dumpster children”:

Police are trying to find three young children who may have been sleeping rough in a dumpster in NSW’s Hunter Valley. Two boys aged four and six and a nine-year-old girl were reported to police after they were found camping out in an industrial bin behind shops on High Street at Maitland.

But the baby whale punched well above his substantial weight in media mentions by blowing the Murray Darling crisis, the WA Election and the garbage kids right out of the water:

And the real bad guy to come out of this sad sea shanty? 

Colin’s mum.

Not since Britney Spears has a neglectful mother got this much bad press.

Half the whale coverage was devoted to the fact that Colin, just like Sean Preston and Jayden James, had been abandoned, left to suck on a boat for sustenance as the sharks circled. As The Herald Sun reported:

In particular, vets will be looking for clues as to why the whale was deserted by its mother  — beginning the tragic story that has gripped the country.

Unsettlingly, we agree with The Daily Tele’s Piers Akerman on this one:

There is also the question of whether the resources being put into the whale rescue attempt may be better used if they were applied to discovering whether in fact three children were living in a garbage skip in Bathurst?

Back on dry land, Crikey has been alarmed by the number of hoon reporters on our roads.

Earlier this week the website roadwatch alerted us to Channel Seven Melbourne reporter Peter Morris’s report on hoons on the road, filed straight to camera, while at the wheel:

Morris protested the next day:

Peter Morris, Seven News, Melbourne, writes: …That man is me… And I think “disgraceful” is a little over the top. The two traffic officers I was working with on Eastlink both saw Tuesday night’s story and they had no issue… and no, I didn’t run anybody off the road, drift out of my lane, exceed the speed limit or smash into anything. Incidentally, look out for me on the Calder Highway… I’m on it every day and if my driving is that disgraceful… keep your distance!

Right after filing a report the night before on “the latest menace on our roads: the angry female driver.”

“Drivers like Marie are causing police major concerns,” reported Morris. “..Statistics show females are becoming more aggressive behind the wheel and that behaviour is causing more serious collisions”

Crikey suggests that AAMI’s next survey should centre around the real menace on our roads: TV reporters.

Meet Nick Coe. The ACA reporter has been busy menacing Beijing’s roads in heavy rain and taking pot shots at Chinese drivers direct to camera.

“There’s only one thing to keep in mind when you’re driving in China — and that is, that nobody cares,” advises Coe.

“They don’t mind if they cut you off, they don’t even seem to mind if you do something particularly stupid.”

But Coe’s insight into the mind of the Chinese driver is particularly enlightening:

“But you’ve got to remember it’s almost thirty years since China introduced the one child policy. So, if they’ve never had to share with any brothers and sisters, well, why would you start sharing the road?” 

Maybe Coe should take Tracy Grimshaw’s advice, pipe down and just keep his “eyes on the road.”